The conversation starts with something many people know too well. A cycle that keeps repeating. Moments of conviction followed by the same decisions, the same regret. It shows up in conversations with listeners, in quiet thoughts and in the realization that nothing external is fixing what is happening internally.
In a recent episode of his podcast This Past Weekend with Theo Von, comedian and host Theo Von addresses that cycle head-on after taking calls from listeners dealing with sobriety, loneliness and destructive patterns. As he responds, the focus shifts inward. What begins as advice turns into personal confession, and Von starts unpacking his own struggle with sin, identity and the desire to change.
He speaks to God directly, without trying to clean it up.
“God, please help me with this. You know, this is a broken part of me that I bring to you. I need help with it. And even God, even as I pray to you right now, there’s a part of me that knows I’m probably lying to you. There’s a part of me that knows I’m going to do that behavior again. So, can you come into that part of me and help me there?”
The context becomes clear. He is talking about patterns he has tried to break and cannot seem to leave behind. He admits the conflict inside him is not just about actions, but desire.
“Will you come into the parts of me that want to do these behaviors again and help me there? Will you come… will you come all the way… past the roots?”
He recognizes something deeper is wrong.
“If there’s a part of me that doesn’t even want the best for me, then there’s something inside of me that is off.”
During the episode, Von references his own past, including struggles with substance abuse, unhealthy coping habits and a long-standing pattern of trying to manage life on his own terms. He also reflects on childhood wounds that shaped how he sees himself, explaining how a lack of connection growing up led him to seek validation from others and build an identity around approval.
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Von also opens up about how his childhood shaped much of what he is dealing with today, pointing specifically to his relationship with his mother.
“I love my mother… but she didn’t connect with me. She didn’t look at me… she wouldn’t hold me that much and she wouldn’t look me in the eyes.”
He explains how that lack of connection followed him into adulthood and affected how he saw himself.
“As a kid I felt like something was wrong with me… if the person that created me won’t even look at me, then something must be so wrong with me.”
That experience led him to seek approval from others, shaping patterns he now recognizes he needs to break.
“I only knew who I was if you reacted to me well… I needed everybody to like me because I didn’t have any sense of self-worth.”
That background feeds directly into what he is dealing with now. The habits, the need for control and the fear of change all connect.
He brings up a moment from Gospel of John that reframes everything.
“Jesus asks him, ‘Do you want to be healed?’ And that’s a crazy question… because if I get healed, then I’m different.”
The weight of that question sits on him, and he does not avoid it.
“Do I want to be healed? Do I really want something different?… A lot of the answer is no. I want something different, but I don’t want… I don’t know if I’m scared of it.”
That hesitation comes from knowing what change requires. Letting go of familiar patterns means letting go of the version of himself he has relied on for years.
Still, there is movement.
“I think I want a new story… I’m tired of that story… it’s been a good story and it served me well, but I don’t want that story anymore.”
He points that desire toward God.
“I’m asking God for a new story… I’m asking God for the next part of me.”
He also explains that something has shifted in how he prays.
“Something that’s been helping me… I just started praying. But I started praying as honestly as I could.”
Alongside that, he describes taking practical steps. He talks about getting up early, working out, going to meetings and following through on commitments. Those actions are part of him learning to show up differently.
Near the end of the episode, he connects it all to the idea of starting over.
“Spring is a time for a new story… I feel like there’s a possibility for something new for me… so I think I’m at least just trying something different today.”
What Von is working through is a God moment. It is the ongoing fight between conviction and habit, between truth and the pull of the past. Many of us have stood in that same place, aware of sin and aware that change must come from God, not self-effort alone.
Now is the time to pray for him.
Pray that Theo Von turns fully from sin. Pray that he repents and submits his life to Jesus Christ. Pray that he accepts Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior and walks in the new life only He provides.
To view the full podcast episode, click here (Editor’s Note: mild language).
James Lasher, a seasoned writer and editor at Charisma Media, combines faith and storytelling with a journalism background from Otterbein University and ministry experience in Guatemala and at the LA Dream Center. A Marine Corps and Air Force veteran, he is the author of The Revelation of Jesus: A Common Man’s Commentary and a contributor to Charisma magazine. For interviews and media inquiries, please contact [email protected].
