The Vatican has released a highly anticipated doctrinal Note reaffirming the Catholic Church’s teaching that marriage is an exclusive, lifelong union between one man and one woman. The document, Una caro In Praise of Monogamy, was approved by Pope Leo XIV and presented this week, offering strong guidance amid rising cultural debates over marriage, sexuality, and personal autonomy.
The Note, as reported by Vatican News, defines Christian marriage as “an indissoluble unity” rooted in “exclusive union and mutual belonging,” while rejecting cultural views that treat relationships as interchangeable or limitless. The document argues that monogamy is not a boundary on love but “the possibility of a love that opens to eternity.”
Below are the key points outlined in the new doctrinal Note:
1. Marriage is exclusively between two people.
The Note states that “only two people can give themselves fully and completely to one another,” and that any form of multi-partner arrangement fractures the integrity of the gift of self.
2. Monogamy is a gift, not a limitation.
The text describes monogamy as “the possibility of a love that opens to eternity,” insisting that exclusive love allows spouses to grow in unity rather than restricting them.
3. Mutual belonging must protect dignity and freedom.
Marriage is rooted in “free consent,” forming a “belonging of the heart” that mirrors the communion of the Trinity. The Note stresses “a holy fear of violating the other’s freedom,” reminding couples that the other “cannot be used as a means to solve one’s own frustrations.”
4. The Church rejects all forms of abuse or coercion within marriage.
The document condemns “explicit or subtle violence, oppression, psychological pressure, control, and ultimately suffocation,” calling these “failures of respect and reverence for the dignity of the other.”
5. Marriage is not ownership or fusion.
According to the text, “marriage is not possession,” and spouses must maintain healthy boundaries. It notes that relationships suffer when a person “loses themselves in the relationship” or when distance becomes excessive.
6. Prayer and sacramental life are central to conjugal love.
The Note says prayer is “a precious means” by which a couple deepens unity, calling conjugal charity “the greatest friendship” that grows through grace.
7. Sexuality is a gift and is ordered toward self-giving.
Sexuality is described as “a marvelous gift of God,” meant to express love rather than impulsive desire. The Note also states that marriage “retains its essential character even when it is childless.”
8. The Church calls for better formation of young people.
The Vatican warns that social media culture, where “modesty vanishes and symbolic and sexual violence proliferate,” requires new education on responsibility, commitment and authentic love.
9. Married couples must look outward through acts of charity.
The Note says the poor are “a family matter,” urging couples to serve the community so their love does not deteriorate into “selfishness, self-reference, and self-enclosure.”
10. Monogamous unity grounds the indissolubility of marriage.
The document affirms that “every authentic marriage is a unity composed of two individuals,” and that unity gives rise to indissolubility. The goal is a conjugal love rooted in a lifelong “promise of the infinite.”
The doctrinal Note also traces monogamy through Scripture, Church tradition and philosophical reflection, highlighting what it calls the deep human meaning of the phrase “we two.”
James Lasher, a seasoned writer and editor at Charisma Media, combines faith and storytelling with a background in journalism from Otterbein University and ministry experience in Guatemala and the LA Dream Center. A Marine Corps and Air Force veteran, he is the author of The Revelation of Jesus: A Common Man’s Commentary and a contributor to Charisma magazine.
