Money Does Matter

A minister received a call from the Internal Revenue Service asking about a member of his church.

“He stated on his income-tax return,” said the official, “that he gave $3,000 last year to your church. Is that correct?”

“I don’t have the records here, and I would have to check on it. But I’ll say this–if he didn’t, he will.”
–Tal D. Bonham

As a hospice chaplain, my husband receives interesting reactions from the patients he visits. Just last week, an 80-year-old woman he stopped by to see really wasn’t interested in talking with him.

However, for one moment, she turned toward him with a gleam in her eye and asked, “Are you my date?”

“No,” he replied, trying to answer in a humorous way, “I don’t think my wife and children would approve.”

“Then you can leave,” she replied.
–Lynette Kittle

A young girl became a Christian in an exciting revival at her church and was baptized the following Sunday morning. That afternoon she ran through the house singing and dancing.

Her sour grandfather rebuked her with these words: “You ought to be ashamed of yourself. Just joined the church and singing and dancing on the Lord’s Day!”

Crushed by her grandfather’s attitude, the little girl went out to the barn, climbed up on the corral fence and observed an old mule standing there with a sad, droopy face and bleary eyes.

As she reached over and patted the mule sympathetically, she said: “Don’t cry, ole mule. I guess you’ve just got the same kind of religion that Grandpa has!”
–Tal D. Bonham