“Leadership” is a popular buzz word in ministry circles but how we lead on a family level—shepherding our marriages and children— is often an elephant in the room. With the prevalent workplace mantra “Leave your personal life at home,” I understand the desire to compartmentalize.
However, God didn’t create us in compartments. He created us holistically. How we conduct ourselves in our families is similar to how we conduct ourselves in other areas of our leadership.
At its core, the good-parenting-good-leadership correlation is a question of healing and wholeness. We’re all flawed as leaders. We all have things needing to be resolved. Without airing all one’s dirty laundry, of course, men and women can authentically model navigating their imperfections for their followers. The followers see that and, instead of thinking the leaders are weak, they see the leaders are real.
One of the most interesting applications of this principle concerns our families. The highest level of leadership in my life is right under my nose: my wife and my children. If I can prioritize what’s most important—my own home—God honors that and I model to other people the significance of that priority.
When it comes to speaking into this topic, hardly anyone is as qualified as my friend, Dr. Lon Flippo, an authority on both biblical parenting and leadership. I recently interviewed him for my podcast and these are some of the practical family leadership priorities he outlined:
– Be on the same page. Smart kids can play parents off of one another if they’re not united.
– Be consistent. Nothing is set up for success when parents set capricious punishments or show poor follow-through.
– Be fair. Don’t let your emotions cause overreactions or inequitable punishments.
– Be forgiving. Like our heavenly Father parents us, forgive in love and unbroken grace.
Examine your current relationship with your children. Is it “a punishment relationship” or “a love relationship”? Love doesn’t mean there are no consequences for our actions but remember… Even the prodigal son had no fear that his father was going to punish him.
To learn more about priorities in your personal life and how they affect your leadership habits, listen to the full podcast episode by visiting randallangley.com/blog. Subscribe to the Pinnacle Leaders Podcast with Dr. Langley to listen to this episode and others for more biblical wisdom on the areas of lordship, leadership and lifestyle. {eoa}
Dr. Randal S. Langley is the president and CEO of Christian Life School of Theology Global (CLSTG), a world leader in theological and leadership education, providing online degree programs and customized Christian higher-education solutions for churches, ministries and other organizations. Dr. Langley is also president of the International Association of Bible Colleges and Seminaries and is a founding partner and certified life coach, teacher and trainer for the John C. Maxwell team. His desire is to help people fulfill their ultimate purpose in life and achieve their God-given dreams.
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