There are principles that can make the difference between failing or succeeding in getting control over what is controlling you. Let’s talk about powering up.
I want to take you to a passage in the Bible in Ecclesiastes 4:9-10. Here we read a verse that gives us the foundation for the power up principle. “Two are better than one, because there is a good reward for their labor together. For if they fall, then one will help up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has no one to help him up.”
Here we see the first principle of powering up: Two are better than one. I have seen countless people try to get control over what was controlling them alone. They try, and they push, but still end up just failing one more time. Being creatures who want to figure out something, we sometimes come to the wrong conclusions.
We try alone, we fail; we try alone, and we fail again. So what most conclude is that it is not possible to get control over what is controlling us. But that’s the wrong conclusion. That’s like a 6-year-old saying his parents are mean because they want him to go to bed at 8:00 for school the next day. The parents want him to get enough sleep so he can do well in school. His conclusion is way off. His parents just want their son to be rested for his next day of school. This conclusion that you can’t get control of an out of control area is also wrong. A better conclusion is that you can’t get control of this area of your life by yourself.
Powering up means you let others really help you. If you were stuck in quicksand and if you are struggling harder and harder by yourself, it doesn’t help you to get out of the quicksand. Rather if someone throws you a rope and you allow his or her strength to pull you up, you are much better off.
If you plan to go it alone again before you do, I want you to really think about this. How many times have you tried your way? Honestly, look at the results. If you see a pattern of failure, why would you want to try your “alone” plan again?
In the 12-step community, they have a definition for insanity: doing the same thing and expecting a different result. Thus the definition for sanity would be trying something different to expect different results.
If you have tried the alone path for years, how about trying something radically different like allowing others to help you get control over what is controlling you.
The second principle of powering up is accountability. Remember our discussion in James 5:16, “Confess your faults to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man accomplishes much.”
You see, for us to heal, we must confess our faults one to another. Yes, God put healing in earthen vessels, but we might have thought to do it differently.
I now know absolutely that if I want healing I have to confess my faults to someone. If I keep my faults and shortcomings to myself, I worked that plan earlier in my life and I know it’s a path to having something control me. Decades have gone by since many things have controlled me. By the grace of God and applying these principles in this book, I have been able to get control of many things that had previously controlled my life.
I find it interesting that the Scripture tells us to confess “our faults.” It’s amazing that the Bible presumes we would have faults. It doesn’t say “if” you have faults but rather what to do with them when you know you have them.
We all have faults, whether anger, pride, rudeness, worthlessness, fear, spending, substances, food or hundreds of others. And if we power up and actually get accountable to someone, we can finally get control of what has been controlling us.
Now getting accountable to someone isn’t instant healing. It’s more a process healing. Over time with consistent and real accountability, you get stronger and reaching your behavioral goals gets easier and easier. Before you know it, your accountability is reporting more of you being in control of your behavior than it is controlling you. {eoa}
Doug Weiss, Ph.D., is a nationally known author, speaker and licensed psychologist. He is the executive director of Heart to Heart Counseling Center in Colorado Springs, Colorado, and the author of several books, including Get a Grip.You may contact Dr. Weiss via his website, drdougweiss.com, by phone at 719-278-3708 or through email at [email protected]
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