If you are asking the question, “How can I break free from porn?” then I say to you—congratulations!
The first step in breaking free from a struggle with porn is to recognize you have one.
So now that you realize pornography has become a destructive force in your life that needs to be overcome, you have taken the first step to freedom.
The path to victory will not be easy or quick. It will demand your total commitment to toughing it out to the very end. But you can do it.
Remember This One Truth
As you begin your journey back to a porn-free life, there will be many actions and truths you will need to follow. You will have men in your church who are willing to walk with you and support you.
But here is the first thing you must accept and never forget: There really is a God who knows the real you and still loves you. No matter how wrapped up in porn you may be, God’s grace is much greater to free you.
“But God demonstrates his own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom. 5:8).
If you’ve been struggling with porn for some time, you will be battling a feeling of worthlessness in your soul. Understanding God’s endless grace, and letting it seep down into the core of who you are is essential in defeating that sense of worthlessness and understanding your identity in Christ.
Some Basic Steps to Take
As you come out of the bondage of pornography, you do not need to run into the bondage of a bunch of rules to follow. If you haven’t already discovered this, trying harder will not work. But there are some basic truths you need to know to anchor your recovery.
Don’t look too far ahead and start to feel overwhelmed. As you begin, just focus on getting a solid starting foundation. Let’s look at some important points.
Stay Positive
You’ve already admitted that you went too far with pornography. You may feel angry, disappointed or even hateful towards yourself. None of that is helpful in your goal to break free from porn. That stuff was your life yesterday; today marks a new beginning.
You are going to need a daily (if not moment by moment) reminder of who God says you are. In the Conquer Series, a powerful cinematic series that helps men find freedom from pornography, host Dr. Ted Roberts calls these truths Prophetic Promises. Find these truths in God’s Word and take time each day to memorize them.
Freedom Comes One Day at a Time
As Covenant Eyes explains, “Your goal today is not, “OK, I’ll never look at porn again!” Instead, it’s, “Today I resolve to be the person God made me to be, and one thing that means is this: today I will not get sucked into lust and pornography.”
There is no silver bullet for recovery. Recovery will take from two to five years. It will be a daily, constant battle, but you can be victorious.
Clear Out Your Porn Stash
Whether you have porn magazines, videos, internet files, or some other place you view porn, you must get rid of them. All of them. Now.
Don’t leave the smallest space for the enemy to get a foothold. This is a battle for your porn-free future. So ask yourself, “How badly do I want this?” You are a warrior, and you will do whatever it takes to break free from porn.
Do Whatever It Takes
Jesus didn’t mince words when He said “cut off your hand,” or “gouge out your eye,” if they lead you to sin. He was highlighting that you have to be prepared to take drastic measures to remove the things that trigger sin from your life. Maybe you need to resort to a not-so-smart phone for a while, or maybe you can’t have a computer in your bedroom anymore.
So if your eye—even your good eye—causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell (Matt. 5:29).
In Alcoholics Anonymous, they have a saying, “Half measures availed us nothing.” Don’t settle for half measures, they won’t work. Throw yourself fully into recovery.
Realize Porn Is Primarily a Brain Issue
What may have started as a moral issue has become a brain issue. Understand that viewing porn creates literal pathways in your brain. That’s what makes addiction so difficult to fight. But over time those pathways can be rewired.
You’ll need other men in your life as you walk through this process, so that they can help you identify unhealthy and addictive thought patterns.
Connect With Other Men
This is absolutely crucial. You cannot fight this battle alone. Men in your church will gladly band together with you as a community of brothers and help you every step of the way.
Author Mike Genung said, “Living connected with others replaces shame with confidence: fear with peace. When we’re accepted for who we are without being judged for our failures, the light of grace shows us that we’re not the scum we’d mistakenly thought we were.”
The Bible also tells us the importance of being transparent with others.
“Confess your faults to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed” (James 5:16, MEV).
Proverbs 28:13 tells us, “He who covers his sins will not prosper, but whoever confesses and forsakes them will have mercy” (Prov. 28:13).
Use a Proven Process
The Conquer Series has helped over 500,000 men in 70 countries learn how to break free from porn.
Each of the two volumes of the Conquer Series contains six DVDs. The action-packed, hard-hitting lessons guide men to an understanding of porn addiction and how it can be overcome. {eoa}
This article originally appeared at conquerseries.com.