Longing for the Dad Who Wasn’t There

• It is individually tailored, not handed out randomly.
Some of God’s children need a loving Father to look them in the eye and
confront them about their sin. Others, who grew up feeling as though
they were never good enough, need to hear Abba Father say, “Relax and
let Me love you. Get to know My mercy.”

We can’t fully understand God’s discipline until we know more about His love.

Abba Father’s Love. Only God’s love is powerful
enough to fill in all the cracks and crevices father-loss left in our
hearts (see 1 John 4:16). Here’s why:

• God’s love is perfect. It is more than creator-object
love or king-subject love. Perhaps above all it is parent-child love
(see 2 Cor. 6:18; 1 John 3:1).

• God’s love is unconditional. Maybe as a child you had
to watch where you stepped around your father. But the unconditional
love of Abba Father will never crumble or break beneath the weight of
our mistakes.

Can you see how God is your Father in the most
down-to-earth, concrete way? He isn’t a far-away God who makes you feel
guilty all the time. He wants to relate to you in every area of life.

Our Part: Becoming God’s Daughters

God is faithful in love and discipline, the perfect
Father. But unless we respond to Him as His daughters, we won’t
understand His intent and devotion toward us.

Many of you may never have had the opportunity to be
little girls while you were growing up. Now you must learn
childlikeness. But how?

We learn much by watching young kids in a healthy
father-child relationship. Many of the ways they relate to a daddy are
worth imitating in our relationship with Abba Father.

First, a little girl usually expects the best of Dad. He
is Superman, Batman and Mr. Rogers all wrapped up into one. She brags
about him to her playmates, making him out to be anything but ordinary.

Second, a young child wants to spend every available minute with her dad. Just to be with him is a good and wonderful thing.

Third, she is constantly displaying her affection for
Dad. She wants to hold her daddy’s hand, kiss him and at times, climb
all over him.

What kind of child are you with Abba Father? Do you brag about Him to others? Sing His praises?

How much time do you spend with Him? What is your posture before Him? What do you call Him?

The End of the Search

One morning soon after Kathy was released from the
hospital, she awakened with a heavy heart but nevertheless attempted to
pray. Suddenly she felt God pour His overwhelming love into her. She’d
never experienced love like that before—love strong enough to touch the
deepest parts of her.

She began to cry. She saw herself as a small child. Jesus was there and lifted her up onto God’s lap.

God lifted her chin and looked into her face. He said He
loved her, that she was priceless and special. She was on His lap for a
long time, crying into His chest and letting Him love her.

For the first time in her life, she knew God really wanted to be her Father and that He loved her as His daughter.

The rest of us may never have a vivid experience as Kathy did. My own revelation of Abba Father has come slowly, bit by bit.

But I no longer need to ask, “Daddy, where were you?”
Today I know where both my fathers are. My earthly father is finally
whole, the man God created him to be. Someday I’ll see him like that,
face to face.

And my heavenly Father is where He has always been—watching over me.

Have you spent your life searching for a father? If so, stop and look up.

You no longer have to ask, “Daddy, where were you?” Your
Father has been there all along. If you ask Him to, He will reveal His
father-love to you in the way you need it most. Your search will end in
His lap—and you will have found Him forever.

Heather Harpham Kopp is the author of seven books, including Praying for the World’s 365 Most Influential People, which she co-authored with her husband, David. Adapted from Daddy, Where Were You? by Heather Harpham Kopp, copyright 1998. Published by Vine Books. Used by permission.