Victimized By Gaslighting? 5 Steps to Finding Freedom

Read Time: 2 minutes 26 seconds

The term “gaslighting” has gone viral across social media this year and Merriam-Webster chose it as their word-of-the-year, saying searches for the word spiked 1,740% in 2022 alone. We’re breaking down what the Bible has to say about gaslighting and what to do if you find yourself being victimized by a narcissist.

Although we all hope to find pastors, mentors and spiritual leaders that embody the characteristics of Jesus, many churchgoers have found themselves under a leader who uses the Bible to gaslight those around them to gain power.

You may have a boss, spouse or friend that makes you feel crazy and you’re always left confused and doubting yourself. That is why we sat down with Suzette, The Marriage Warrior, and Founder and CEO of Couples Care Center to talk about the signs and symptoms of narcissism.

“The definition of gaslighting is manipulative, emotional or psychological tactic that offsets you from your own reality,” Suzette says.

So where does this all start?

Someone with the characteristics of a narcissist have something called a “narcissistic injury,” which is usually a trauma the person has never dealt with. The gaslighter knows what they are doing and the reason for deflection is to take the attention off of themselves and put it onto to another person.

Their goal is to:

• Avoid vulnerability at all costs.
• Take their own pain and put it on to someone else.
• Never admit to wrongdoing and avoid confrontation.

Even if you are trying to reason with someone who is gaslighting you, the individual often feels threatened by the confrontation. If you work with, live with or are around a narcissist, you never know when you are stepping on a “landmine” that can trigger a reaction.

Suzette says gaslighting is a “crazy maker” because you are often left questioning and doubting yourself. Your original goal may have been to address an issue that is important to you but the gaslighter pulls you off that subject and makes you the problem leading to self doubt or self esteem issues.

What does the Bible say?

For someone who has dealt with and studied the topic for many years, Suzette believes God is unveiling the whole system of toxicity to enlighten people on what the Bible says.

In the book of Isaiah, the Bible says “come let us reason together,” but for the narcissist who is gaslighting you, there is no way to reason with that type of behavior.

While the severity of the problem can vary, she says it is a “very spiritual, psychological, emotional and mental problem.” Narcissism consumes the fullness of a person. As a spiritual matter, narcissism deals with the hardness of a heart.

There is a light at the end of the tunnel!

While recovering and understanding your own or someone else’s narcissistic injury may be a long process, there is hope for healing and freedom. The main step is that the person has to be willing to step up to the plate and deal with the issue.

Now is the hour to pray against this tactic that the enemy is using to destroy marriages, unity in the Body of Christ and church leadership!

Tune into the rest of the video to hear the protocol Suzette uses to help couples find freedom on the other side. {eoa}

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Shelby Bowen is an assistant editor for Charisma Media.