Dr. Carol Peters-Tanksley

What does the self-talk in your head sound like? What do you tell yourself? Perhaps like so many people, you keep second-guessing yourself, wondering whether you’ve got what it takes. The self-defeating messages keep screaming, and you feel paralyzed. Is there an antidote to self-doubt? In one sense, you don’t have what it takes. Does…

You may have married before you became a Christian and now feel the growing disconnect between your newer relationship with Jesus and your relationship with your spouse. You may have married someone who is not a Christian, thinking things would work out, and they most certainly have not. Or you may have married believing your…

Whether or not you realize it, you are a theologian. Theology is nothing more than what you believe about God. And the kind of God you serve makes a tremendous difference in just about everything in your life. When someone says, “I don’t believe in God” ask them what kind of God they don’t believe…

If your marriage is good, be grateful! Those struggling in a bad marriage can learn a lot from you. But God is not satisfied with good; He desires your marriage to be “very good.” He wants it to be great! When two people love God, love each other and are committed to ongoing growth, you…

Some marriages are just plain bad. Words like sharp knives pierce tender hearts. Affection and sex are demanded, withheld, or used as bait to control and demean. God-talk is mixed with manipulation and shame. Pleas for change go unheeded. Sex and intimacy are sought outside of the marriage covenant. And the list goes on. The…

Why are you here? What is the reason God placed you on this earth? Many people struggle with that question. Without a sense of purpose people become depressed, while having a reason to live makes it possible to thrive even in the worst of circumstances. Fulfilling God’s purpose for you is one of those big…

The very first institution God gave to humankind in the Garden of Eden was marriage. Surely He knew that marriage, intimacy, sex, and all related “issues” would get so messed up by the enemy that they would become the source of untold misery and pain. So God’s design for intimacy in marriage must have been…

Every marriage will have periods of challenge, times when “till death do us part” seems beyond your ability to handle. Let’s assume you have prayed and fully considered the circumstances, and are certain that God is calling you to remain in this marriage. What then? How do you survive if you stay in a bad…

Jesus said that even though it was not God’s original design for marriage, divorce is “allowed” in some circumstances “for the hardness of your hearts” (Matt. 19:8). For the Christian believer who takes Jesus’ words seriously, what does that mean? How bad do things have to be in order to leave your marriage? How do…

It is tragic but too often true: If you want to start a fight among Christians, just start talking about church. One says, “I’m following Jesus, but I don’t do church.” Another says, “My church is right, and yours is wrong.” Yet another says, “I pick and choose—church when I feel like it, not when…

The right first step in every situation is to pray, “God, help me! Jesus, come!” Inviting Him to be with you always makes a difference. But there’s almost always a second critical step to that two-part prayer that’s just as important; “What step do You need me to take next?” It’s important to get the…

One of the most frequent desires I hear from married people is, “I wish my spouse and I could get on the same page.” Two people hitched together can’t make progress if they’re pulling in opposite directions. Your marriage is not a business. But for a moment, think of what it would be like if…

Valentine’s Day is coming up next week. If you’re a wife, you may be thinking, I hope he remembers! If you’re a husband you may be thinking, Oh no, again? Or maybe you’re thinking, I wish this day would go away. Could I have possibly married anyone less romantic? If love is a feeling, then…

You face a problem. How do you bring your faith into play when that happens? The way in which you do so makes a difference. And in that light, there’s a two-part prayer that applies to almost any such situation Perhaps you’re the kind of person who naturally tries to figure things out and make…

Why did you get married? Are those reasons still applicable today? Do you and your spouse agree on the why of your marriage? Might God have a purpose for your marriage? Do you know what your mission in marriage is? You might have gotten married for any number of reasons. Perhaps it was kind of…