“He does not treat us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. … Like a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord gives compassion to those who fear Him” (Ps. 103:10, 13).
“Can a woman forget her nursing child, and have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget” (Is. 49:15).
And the apostle Paul gave himself as an example of this kind of encouraging treatment of children.
“As you know, we exhorted, comforted, and commanded every one of you, as a father does his own children, that you would walk in a manner worthy of God, who has called you to His kingdom and glory” (1 Thess. 2:11-12).
9. The responsibility of parents to require obedience is underlined by the duty God gives to children to obey.
We see this in the Bible’s direct commands to children.
“Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land which the Lord your God is giving you” (Ex. 20:12 = Deut. 5:16; Matt. 15:4; Mark 10:19).
“Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. ‘Honor your father and mother,’ which is the first commandment with a promise, ‘so that it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth'” (Eph. 6:1-3).
“Children, obey your parents in all things, for this is well pleasing to the Lord” (Col. 3:20).
And we see our duty as parents to require obedience of our children in the way the Scriptures indict those who do not obey their parents.
“And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind, to do those things which are not proper. … They are gossips, slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty … disobedient to parents” (Rom. 1:28-30).
“Men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boastful, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy” (2 Tim. 3:2).
And the elders of the church are told to model for their people a home life with submissive children.
“… and one who manages his own house well, having his children in submission with all reverence” (1 Tim. 3:4).
10. The both-and task of parenting—encouraging and discipling—is rooted in God’s purpose that true biblical faith flourishes when Christians (and their children) are regularly reminded of God’s kindness and his severity.
You stand fast through faith. So do not become proud, but fear. … Note then the kindness and the severity of God. (Romans 11:20–22)
“Faith flourishes when Christians (and their children) are reminded of God’s kindness and his severity.”
The kind of fear we should cultivate in ourselves as Christians, and in our children, is not the cowering fear that slaves have of their masters, but the reverential fear of the one we love and delight to please — a fear that awakens when we are drifting from him, and sends us hurrying back. Such is the fear of God that is the beginning of wisdom (Proverbs 9:10). It is what we feel toward our Father in heaven (1 Peter 1:17; Psalm 103:13), and what we expect our children to learn from our fatherly kindness and discipline. “My son, fear the Lord” (Proverbs 24:21).
Faithful Parenting Takes Sacrifice
Parenting is a very high calling from God. It is one of the most influential roles in the world. It portrays God to children before they know what God is like. It shapes them profoundly. It is the way God designed for His saving truth to pass from one generation to the next. It is not easy but costly.
Passive parenting is easy, and bears bitter fruit. Faithful parenting demands sacrifice and self-denial. It is not guaranteed success. The best-reared children may rebel. God’s did. “Children have I reared and brought up, but they have rebelled against me” (Is. 1:2). This is a great sorrow. But it is not the bitter fruit of parental neglect.
Pour out your prayers to God, and give your heart to your children. Give them your strength, and give them God’s truth. The rewards will be great. And you will not regret it.
John Piper (@JohnPiper) is founder and teacher of desiringGod.org and chancellor of Bethlehem College & Seminary. For 33 years, he served as pastor of Bethlehem Baptist Church, Minneapolis, Minnesota. He is author of more than 50 books.
For the original article, visit johnpiper.com.
Janet Perez Eckles 
Shawn Akers 
Abby Trivett