Evaluate Your Relationships

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jimmy stewart

Nicki Pfeifer

Nicki Pfeifer
When God wants to bless you, He brings people into
your life. When Satan wants to destroy you, he brings people into your life.
And sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference.

We are in a season in
which God wants to strengthen kingdom relationships. God wants us engaged in
relationships that are healthy and productive, not burdensome and destructive.

There are basically two
types of relationships: those that build up your life and those that destroy
your life. Healthy relationships add to your life, bringing increase and
blessing to you. Unhealthy relationships tear you down, drain you, and seek to
divide you from God and the destiny He has for you.

Right now we need to
evaluate the relationships in our lives. I’m not talking about relationships
you have entered into such as a marriage covenant or relationships such as
those you have with your father, sister, children and so on. I am talking about
friendship-based relationships, business-based relationships and casual

Ask yourself this
question: “Are there people in my life who are bringing me down?” If so, then
you need to consider how you can keep yourself away from their influence.

On the other hand, ask
yourself, “Are there people in my life who are building me up?” You must
surround yourself with these types of relationships that add to your life, not
leave you feeling spent and deleted.

Now I will minister to
anyone God puts in my path; however, I don’t personally attach with everyone I
come in contact with. There is a difference between association and attachment.
There is a difference between relationships of comfort and relationships of

This is a time to know
whom you are attached to, committed to and in covenant with. You need to attach
to people who can help you find your kingdom purpose and help you step into
your destiny.

How do we know whom we
should connect with? How do we create and maintain healthy relationships?

First, let’s identify what
constitutes an unhealthy relationship: 

  1. People who constantly bring strife, chaos and stress into your
  2. People who drain you and can’t seem to make it without you
  3. People who want to remind you of your past
  4. People who want to hold you back and keep you from your destiny
  5. People who don’t honor and respect your salvation and who entice
    you to sin

We must seek to create and maintain
attachments that are healthy for us and bring blessing to us. What type of
people do we want to attach with? Who do we want to enter into covenant relationships
with? What should we look for in a healthy relationship?

  1. People who celebrate you
  2. People who challenge and motivate you
  3. People who make you better than you are
  4. People who see past your present and see your potential
  5. People who focus on your future, not your past

These are the types of relationships
that God builds His kingdom upon. These are the kinds of relationships that
help you reach your full potential. Look for these people. God has positioned
them all around you.

But most of all, be that type of
and watch what God can do through you!

About the author: Nicki Pfeifer is co-founder with her husband, Mark, of Open Door Ministries in Chillicothe, Ohio (opendoorohio.com), where they serve as senior pastors. They are also the founders of Mark and Nicki Pfiefer Ministries (markandnicki.com), and Nicki is the founder of the Fire School of Prophetic Training, which
has locations throughout the U.S., Asia and Africa. A
recognized prophetic voice, Nicki is in demand as a speaker at
conferences in the United States and other countries.

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