The strongman of immorality can and must be overcome in
our lives and in our churches. There are specific things we can do to
ensure his defeat.
1. Flee temptation. If you are struggling to
overcome sexual sin, it is your responsibility to flee temptation. Be
wise. Avoid situations that would contribute to sexual arousal. For
example, if you are dating, don’t allow your date to sexually arouse
you with kisses, touches or any other kind of stimulation.
If soft music turns you on, put on some hymns or a loud Kirk Franklin album. Play a marching band if you must!
More importantly, associate with those who have the same
attitude about sexual purity that you do. I know it can be difficult to
track them down, but there are saved brothers and sisters out there
somewhere. Entreat the Holy Spirit to help you find them.
2. Ask for help. If you need special help, seek
out a Christian therapist or physician who is trained in handling the
behavioral problems and addictions that have a stranglehold on your
life. All healing comes from the Lord, but not everyone is able to get
free from behavioral problems without assistance.
3. Take the risks seriously. If you know what is
right but are choosing to live in willful disobedience, I ask: Is it
worth the risk? As a Christian participating in a sexually immoral
lifestyle, you risk death from incurable, sexually transmitted diseases
such as AIDS, hepatitis and more. You risk losing your mate and your
family because of your unfaithfulness. You risk losing your self-esteem
and the respect of your peers and neighbors. You risk devastating your
business or profession, especially if you are in ministry. Worst of
all, you risk your fellowship with the Lord.
4. Make a commitment. It doesn’t matter whether
the behavior you’re involved in is “trendy” or not. As a Christian, you
are a “slave of righteousness,” and your call is to crucify the lusts
of the flesh. It is possible to live holy if you desire to do so.
Commit yourself to staying before the Lord on a daily basis and
avoiding anything that would contribute to your taste for immoral
pleasures or gratification outside of marriage.
5. Confront unfaithfulness. If you are a Christian
wife and your husband has been unfaithful, ask yourself: Is your spouse
truly repentant, and will he remain faithful after repentance? Is the
unfaithfulness a continuous practice, or was it just one breach of
fidelity? Is your spouse a professing Christian, or does he just go to
church on Sunday? Is he a Spirit-filled man whom Satan tripped up but
who is now truly repentant?
Only you can answer these questions. Forgiveness is
possible—and biblical—but the Bible also says that you are not
obligated to remain with an unfaithful mate. If you choose to stay with
him, you must realize that your husband’s unfaithfulness could well
mean your early demise from undetected disease. Given the severity of
the sexual diseases among us, I strongly suggest a period of sexual
abstinence and then the use of protection at all times, even after lab
reports have determined that your mate is disease-free.
Even if your husband is a pastor or church leader, do not
hesitate to confront him head-on about his infidelity and report it to
the other church authorities. Women must stop shielding and hiding such
behavior. Many are suffering physical abuse and threats from these
“spiritual leaders” because they are too afraid or too embarrassed to
expose them.
Stop being a punching bag for these unregenerate heathen!
The Word tells us that a man is worse than an infidel if he neglects
his family (see 1 Tim. 5:8). Seek legal help to get the support you
need to maintain your family and yourself. There are laws on the books
that address adultery!
6. Don’t accept excuses. If you are a member of a
congregation and discover that one of your leaders is being sexually
immoral, you have a responsibility to bring it to the attention of the
church leadership. This action must not be based on hearsay or gossip.
But if you know without a doubt, then it is your duty as a Christian to
pull the covers off this festering boil that affects the whole body of
Christ.
There are no excuses. We do things because we want to do
them, and your pastor or leader is no exception. Besides, how can you
sit under the leadership of a hypocrite who thumbs his nose at God’s
state of holy matrimony?
Yes, it takes courage to uncover sin, but it must be
done—even if you are rejected by the leadership. Even if you’re called
a liar! Just pick up your marbles and move to another ministry after
you have sought God’s face. You don’t want to find that you’ve run from
the frying pan into the fire.
7. Confess your sin. If you are a Christian
leader, pastor or minister involved in sexual immorality, you need to
confess your sin and seek serious counseling—both psychological and
spiritual. I personally believe you need to be relieved of your
position during this process. You cannot continue on as though nothing
has happened. There needs to be public repentance and restoration
before you mount the pulpit again or accept any kind of leadership
position.
8. Stand up for holiness. To all believers and
ministers of the gospel, I say: Wake up! We need to combine forces to
lead a strong, faith-based, biblical attack on the scourge of sexual
immorality that has become epidemic in our congregations.
It is time to stand up for Jesus. It is time to rebuild
the walls of holiness and sexual purity in the church so that we are no
longer a reproach to the world. In the words of Nehemiah 2:8: “Let us
rise up and build!”
Judy Ann Fisher is the founder and pastor of the Full
Gospel Church of the Lord’s Missions International in Washington, D.C.
She is also the international executive director of its missions
service organization, Mercy Outreach Ministry International. A gifted
businesswoman, she is owner of several companies and has traveled
extensively as a motivator, lecturer and presenter of her Human
Sexuality series.
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