In the poignant, beautifully filmed Ed’s Story film series, author and former Calvary Church pastor Ed Dobson offers hope as he reflects on living with Lou Gehrig’s disease. Having retired from the pulpit due to the sickness, Dobson discusses issues of identity, humility and forgiveness on the two newest releases of this seven-part series.

The famous Scopes Monkey Trial, a courtroom battle over the teaching of evolution that secured a small Tennessee town a much-misrepresented footnote in history, is the backdrop for Alleged, starring Nathan West (Miracle) and Ashley Johnson (The Help).

Whenever the cloud lifted from above the tabernacle, they would set out; but if the cloud did not lift, they did not set out—until the day it lifted. —Exodus 40:36-37

Sometimes it is God’s will for you to just stay. You may want to move on—but God may want you to stay. You may say, “It’s time to get moving. Let’s get the show on the road.” But God says, “Stay. In quietness and trust is your strength” (Isa. 30:15).

The ancient people of Israel had to learn this lesson. They had to learn to take their cues from the visible glory of God—the pillar of fire by night and the cloud by day.

Israel was locked into this manner of direct guidance from God. They could only move when the cloud lifted. If the cloud did not lift, they stayed. No matter how tedious and tasteless that particular place in the wilderness might have been, they had to “stay put” until they were released to move on. The cloud did not adjust to the Israelites; they had to adjust to the cloud. It often takes as much courage to stay as it does to move. It may take even more faith sometimes to remain where you are than to explore a new geographical area.

It may not be mere boredom, however, that tempts you to move on. Sometimes it is opposition. Whatever the case may be, whenever God says, “Stay,” it is with a definite purpose. You will never be sorry when you remain where we are, even though you may not know the reasons at the time, if God says you must.

Excerpted from The Sensitivity of the Spirit (Charisma House, 2002).

win a copy!

If your life is crumbling

… then you really need to read Riva Tims’ new book, When It All Falls Apart. Win a copy at fallsapart.charismamag.com.

Know your charismatic roots 
Why do most churches today incorporate a Pentecostal style of worship? What’s the fastest-growing part of the global church today? Why are there so many different types of charismatics? Watch charismatic historian Vinson Synan answer these and other questions at 
synan.charismamag.com. 

cost of being messianic

As Messianic Jews living in Israel, the Ortiz family were victims of a terrorist attack yet blamed for the same bombing that almost claimed their son’s life (see p. 56). Find out how you can pray for Israel’s Messianic community at messianic.charismamag.com.

how to squash a global disease

 
Malaria doesn’t affect many people in the U.S., but the mosquito-borne disease still kills 2,000 children every day globally. Visit malaria.charismamag.com to discover how you can join the movement to wipe out malaria across the world.

Never Give Up

Christians often become weary in the face of adversity and persecution. Some give up their faith in Christ altogether. Go to relentless.charismamag.com to find out how God can give you power to stand through whatever attacks the enemy sends your way.

Rekindle the fire
Get practical advice from Christian relationship counselor Doug Weiss as he shares how a couple can rekindle the love in their relationship at rekindle.charismamag.com.

“Your December issue made our Christmas so special in celebrating our Savior’s birth.”

—Joe and Jeanie Perez

REDISCOVERING CHRISTMAS

I’ve been completely inspired by Peter Bertolero’s “Rediscovering the Beauty of Christmas” (December), as I really wish to celebrate the true essence of Christmas. I will not be buying Christmas presents this year. The focus will be on giving to the needs of the poorer community. I also found “Decoding a Christmas Carol” fascinating, as I had always wondered how this song originated.  

Lynsey Griffin, via email

I hope Christian worship and celebrations are more than just traditions. Over the years there has been too much change; history has been lost. Unfortunately, “tradition” in many ways has caused changes far removed from the origins of Scripture. The beauty of Christmas isn’t in symbols and elements of celebrations, but in the result and understanding of prophecy.  

Betty Sharon Thompson, San Antonio

Your December issue made our Christmas so special in celebrating our Savior’s birth. One of the best—if not the best—issues we’ve received in nearly 30 years of subscribing. Thank you!

Joe and Jeanie Perez, Fenton, Mich.

THE BREAD AND THE WINE

Referencing Stephen Mansfield and David Holland’s “So Help Us, God” (November), I was astounded that they would consider as strange the Catholic Church’s belief that in holy communion the bread and wine become the “body and blood” of our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. They apparently do not consider literally the words of Jesus: “This is my body; this is my blood.” As to the authors’ claim of “bias” against Pentecostals, there also seems to be a great deal of it against Catholics. They are our Christian siblings; like us, some are sheep and some are goats, but God loves us all.

Frances Hesterman, Sand Springs, Okla.

DON’T BE SLACK ON SIN

“Out, But Not Disqualified” by Richie Hughes (November), is very troubling, as it appears to claim that God condones homosexuality. God says homosexuality is a sin, and sin destroys us. Even though God accepts us as we are, He loves us too much to leave us in a destructive lifestyle. Thank God that, when we accept Jesus as Lord and Savior, His Holy Spirit begins to transform our lives into His likeness.

Lucille Brown, Los Alamos, N.M.

God is moving outside the walls of the church, but have we become so “religious” that we’ve failed to notice?

One of the biggest dangers Christians face is thinking inside the proverbial religious box. When we talk about “a great move of God” or “revival” we often contextualize it inside a church building. 

Even when we take it “to the streets” it still looks a lot like it does inside the church walls. We speak to people using the same language and pray for them just like we do in church, except that the setting has changed.

If people are not interested in experiencing it inside the church, then why would they want to experience it outside the church? Trying to invoke a move of God this way does not recognize how God is already moving in people’s lives apart from traditional church activities.

The New Testament church was different. They had an advantage. The fact that they had no buildings or traditions to protect provided them with a wide-open field of thinking. They were able to see the world in a whole new light, one that exposed the closed-mindedness of the Jewish ideas regarding the work of God among the gentile people.

Like those first-century Jewish leaders, Christians today can become extremely closed-minded about God’s activity outside our circles. After a span of 2,000 years, we seem to believe that God thinks like us, acts like us, votes like us, talks like us and enjoys hanging with us.

This was especially true with Paul until Jesus confronted him on the road to Damascus. That one conversation with Jesus obliterated every preconceived idea and paradigm Paul ever had. Nothing was the same for him after that. He had to reconstruct his entire religious, social, cultural and political worldviews.

Mental deconstruction is usually harder than construction. This is why it was about 14 years between Paul’s conversion and the time he and Barnabas were sent out in Acts 13. He needed time to rethink everything.

After completing his first missionary journey—one that saw more gentiles coming to Christ than Jews—Paul chose Silas and went out again (see Acts 16). With some experience under his belt, Paul and his entourage traversed the length of Asia Minor, crossed over to Macedonia and started the Grecian campaign.

At Mars Hill, Paul presented a remarkable and brilliant perspective on the move of God outside the walls of the church. What he said would stun anyone who believes that God moves only in certain ways, with certain people (like us) and in certain places.

Paul said that God had been revealing Himself in various ways with various cultures from the beginning; that God loves all human beings and is active in bringing them into a relationship with Him through various means (see Acts 17:22-31).

While walking the streets of Athens, Paul saw many idols that the Greeks worshipped. Among them was a statue dedicated to “The Unknown God.” The Athenians knew there was a God out there who couldn’t be named yet deserved to be worshipped. Regarding this God and their worship, Paul said, “Therefore, the One whom you worship without knowing, Him I proclaim to you” (Acts 17:23).

Paul affirms that the Athenians had been ignorantly worshipping the God of the Jews—Yahweh. They simply had not known His name and did not have the full revelation of His ways and desires for mankind.

It didn’t mean they were in covenant with God. It didn’t mean they were born again. But it did testify to the fact that God was working in their hearts, having placed in them a desire to know Him. 

Paul discerned God’s work in that culture and aligned his message with the move of God. He spoke to the Athenians in relevant ways.

Like Paul, we must have an open mind and look outside our religious box to see where God is going.

What I see God doing in the culture is exciting. More and more people are looking for what’s real. Slick productions are being replaced by reality TV. People value participation. They would rather watch a YouTube video than TV.

People want to connect with each other. The global community is getting smaller as technology drives everything from the economy to the uprisings of the so-called Arab Spring. 

Do you see God in all this?

Christians today can become closed-minded about God’s activity outside our circles.

Nicki Pfeifer is co-founder with her husband, Mark, of Open Door Ministries in Chillicothe, Ohio (opendoorohio.com), where they serve as senior pastors. They are also the founders of Mark and Nicki Pfiefer Ministries (markandnicki.com).

The Church of God of Prophecy’s general overseer addresses the denomination’s leadership transition, future growth—and how to distinguish between COGOP and COG

CHARISMA: Last year the Church of God of Prophecy (COGOP) celebrated its 125th anniversary. That’s quite a milestone. What have been some key turning points along the way?

Howard: COGOP was family-led for many years through the Tomlinson family—we appreciate A.J. and his son, M.A. Tomlinson. The translation of leadership away from the family was a clear transition of this church’s ministry, vision and focus. It went to the core of our identity and really began to refocus our ministry’s identity toward gospel spreading, kingdom building, church planting and outreach. It was probably the healthiest thing that has happened to this organization in the last 50 years. 

CHARISMA: What do you see for the denomination going forward?

Howard: We’re five times larger now than we were 20 years ago. Two things factor into that: one is our transition of vision of ministry through Bishop Billy Murray, and the second is the worldwide work of God. God has completely opened the doors to nations, and the hearts of people have opened wide in the nations. God is pouring out His Spirit all over the earth. 

We are now in our new day. Over the last 30 years we have been deeply committed to evangelization. We’re a ministry that’s out there fishing—that’s the way I say it. We are not large, and we are not the largest in the world. But we’re committed to fishing and missions and world global outreach and church planting. And with those strong commitments in our hearts and these days in which God is moving, if you’re genuinely fishing, then you’re catching and attempting to plant churches all over the world. 

We’re in 130 nations, and that will continue to increase. We are a saturation church-planting ministry, which means once we are in a nation or we begin to plant around a church through mothering and institutional outreach, we will continue to fish as long as God continues to work on the hearts of lost people all over the world. That brings us to our third challenge for the future: developing more leaders. We’ve saturated our leadership core with the body we have and now we have to develop more new leaders to continue reaching in the harvest and growing. We see that as being the greatest need because it will compliment and establish the evangelism foundation that we have. 

CHARISMA: That makes perfect sense, given the leadership crisis around the world and particularly in the church. 

Howard: I’m treasurer of the Pentecostal Charismatic Leaders of North America, and every time that group gets together we are crying for new young leaders. This isn’t something that is unique; evangelical leaders are doing the same. 

CHARISMA: Speaking of evangelical leaders, many of them have established a voice to speak out on various social issues. Do you think that Pentecostal denominations have a strong enough voice in this area? 

Howard: I think the voice of spiritual ministries is not so much in a social presence as it is in the many who are statistically validating that millions are receiving the Holy Spirit around the world—and their presence is then being built more and more in the communities and nations where they are. Take Brazil, for instance. It’s the largest Catholic nation in the world, but the rise of the Spirit-filled church within the nation cannot be ignored. Its influence is being seen in the social and political realm as well. That is the voice that will rise—not so much the intentional voice of social and political presence, but the voice of presence in a mass. We are seeing that in Africa and Asia and all around the world. The voice of presence is going to create more and more avenues to be heard. 

CHARISMA: Even charismatics get confused with the differences between the Church of God and the COGOP. Doctrinally is there a way for people to easily distinguish between the two? 

Howard: Today there is very little doctrinal difference between these two churches—it’s probably more policy that would mark any differences. We’re both about the common believers coming to church seeking salvation and grace and the work of the Holy Spirit. We are close friends, and we feel like we’re brothers and sisters—we have the same baby pictures, the same foundations, the same founder out of the same callings out of the holiness revival out of North Carolina. Doctrinally it would be hard to find the small differences that we have, which are more oriented to our structure and government and aren’t obvious to Sunday churchgoers. We aren’t interested so much in the differences. God is bringing unity around the world among those who stand together for the gospel of Christ.

Three years ago Riva Tims lived through a high-profile scandal that ended her marriage, stripped her of a thriving ministry and left her with virtually no income. Last fall her ex-husband, Zachery Tims, was found dead in a New York hotel room. Now Riva opens up about the details of her journey—and how God has brought her new life.

The roar of the engine at 30,000 feet couldn’t silence the noise inside Riva Tims’ head as she flew to New York City last fall. It had been less than 24 hours since she’d learned that Zachery Tims, her ex-husband and the pastor of an 8,000-member church in the Orlando, Fla.-area had been found dead in his hotel room.

How is this happening? Maybe there’s been a mistake. Maybe it isn’t true. I’m not ready to lose him yet.

It just didn’t settle with her, even while she held her children’s trembling bodies as they cried upon hearing the news. Inside, she held on to a faint hope that maybe this was all a sick joke. But as she stood in the cold morgue and stared at a picture of the lifeless body of the 42-year-old father of her four children, it finally hit her, as if part of her had also just died.

She knew the feeling all too well.

Only a few years earlier, she had experienced another death of sorts. After a seemingly picture-perfect, 15-year ministry marriage to Zachery—they regularly appeared side-by-side as hosts of the Trinity Broadcasting Network’s flagship show and in 2006 were featured on the cover of Charisma—everything changed when Zachery confessed to an affair. Their two-year separation and eventual divorce seemed unbearable to Riva at the time. And yet here she was again, slowly dying on the inside.

“I grieved when I went through the divorce,” she says. “I grieved because I had lost my husband. I grieved with losing the ministry that I birthed. But when Zach died, I grieved all over again.”

This wasn’t how she’d planned for life to go—certainly not how it was supposed to happen. Despite her small frame and striking natural beauty, this spiritual powerhouse has taken more hits in the past five years than most people face over an entire lifetime. And today, through all the betrayal, scandal, death and struggles surrounding her marriage and ministry, Riva continues to take hits for the kingdom of God. Yet something is different now. Something deep, she says, that has not only brought healing and wholeness, but has also set her free to enjoy the new life she’s found in God.

The Initial Hit
The death of Riva and Zachery’s marriage began during, of all things, a prayer conference call. That’s where an intercessor solemnly told Riva at the Holy Spirit’s prompting: “Pastor Riva, your husband, I believe, is in adultery.”

As dreadful as those words were, they confirmed a gnawing feeling that had anchored in the pit of Riva’s stomach days before. She had been married to Zachery for 14 years but knew something in their marriage and in her husband had changed. What eluded her was how they could end up here after building and enduring so much together.

Their marriage story had been one of polar opposites converging. Riva grew up in a middle-class, Christian home in Mitchellville, Md., with her mother, a ranking federal government official, father, a state government regional director and former recon Marine, and twin sister, Rená. By the time she was 12, Riva served as a junior trustee at her church. At 19, she and her sister were the youngest deacons in their Baltimore congregation.

Riva was also committed to remaining sexually pure until marriage. After earning a bachelor’s degree in hospital administration at the University of Maryland, Baltimore County, she enrolled in a Bible school at her church and met Zachery—a handsome, brash fellow student who wore a leather farmer’s jumpsuit (trendy at the time) the first time they saw each other. His passion for God was magnetic, and his boldness for the Word (he was called one of the “sons of thunder” at his church) attracted Riva. Though their pasts were galaxies apart—he had been a drug dealer and addict, and was charged with attempted murder before getting saved at age 19—they married and two years later were sent out by their home church to Orlando, Fla., to plant New Destiny Christian Center (NDCC) in 1996.

Those early years were anything but easy. Not only was the couple adjusting to newlywed life, prior to leaving Maryland their second child was diagnosed with cerebral palsy.

“We had no family, no jobs and no money in Orlando,” Riva recalls of the season. “The stress was unbearable at times, and I thought a nervous breakdown was imminent.”

She worked a secular job to support the family, which grew to include four children, while Zachery focused on the ministry. And then it happened.

Within five years what started as four people meeting in a hotel room grew into a church of 8,000 congregating on a 21-acre campus. NDCC became a prominent force in the local community, aiding thousands through job fairs and supplying the needy with food, clothes, toys, cars and even houses. As the church grew in size, so did its sphere of ministry: NDCC’s TV and radio broadcasts reached a potential 100 million homes daily. Riva and “Pastor Zach” appeared to be the model ministry couple as they testified over the airwaves of Jesus’ saving power.

But the meteoric rise, as often is the case, came with a hefty price. Riva sensed the church’s vision shifting; numbers were becoming more important than God’s direction and, in her words, the “anointing wasn’t there.” So when she began having that gnawing feeling that Zachery was not being faithful—a sense undergirded by the intercessor’s words—Riva was determined to confront the matter head-on.

Zachery confessed to having an affair, though at the time he didn’t reveal the full story. Regardless, the dying process had begun, and Riva could feel its deep sting.

“The devastating part was how could this be, in that we said that we would never go down that road,” Riva recalls of the marriage covenant they made years earlier. “But there was a part of me that thought [his confession] could bring hope. This could bring change for the better.”

Determined to heal their marriage, the couple decided not to alert their congregation and, with only a few family members and close friends aware of their struggle, began counseling. Among those in the loop was Zachery and Riva’s spiritual father, Douglas Chukwuemeka, the senior pastor of New Destiny Christian Church in Laveen, Ariz., who led Zachery to the Lord in 1991. Chukwuemeka had been Zachery’s best man in the Tims’ wedding and a close confidant to both of them throughout the years. He saw the pain Riva was going through and marveled at how she handled the situation.

“Riva was so graceful and so determined to try to make things work,” Chukwuemeka says now. “She never talked bad about things. She never defamed the marriage or [Zachery’s] name or anything like that. She was just the opposite; she was always reaching out.

Something in Zachery remained unchanged, however. For months the couple confided in counselors Zachery recommended, but Riva soon began to feel that the goal of the sessions wasn’t the reconciliation of their marriage but to get “Pastor Zach” strong enough to continue in the ministry. 

“That’s why I began to get angry,” Riva says. “I was thinking, ‘What is more important, the family or him being in the pulpit?’”

The process almost became unbearable for Riva when Zachery’s former mistress began contacting media outlets, including Charisma, to reveal the details of her 14-month affair with the megachurch pastor. Zachery was soon standing before his congregation, with Riva by his side, apologizing for an “indiscretion.”

After several months of unfruitful counseling—including female leaders in the body of Christ telling her that “men of great influence and power have bigger sexual appetites” and “you might not be the only lady, but you are the first lady”—Riva became distraught by the unbiblical advice being leveled at her. And while her husband remained in the pulpit, their marriage only grew worse.

Separation Anxiety
Riva remained separated, hoping this would jolt her husband into authentic change and prompt an eventual reconciliation. Instead, church leaders stripped Riva of her title as co-pastor at NDCC and her full-time job at the church. She was left with no job or health insurance raising four kids—including her special-needs son. The new pressures took a physical toll on Riva’s body. She couldn’t eat or sleep for days at a time and was in and out of the hospital with various ailments, including a low blood count and low heart rate.

“There were times when I literally thought I would die. My world was falling apart, and I felt there was nothing I could do but stand by helplessly,” she writes in her new book, When It All Falls Apart (see sidebar below).

Adding to her pain, the rumor mill continued to churn out lies about Riva and her marriage. Ministry friends she thought would support her through the trial instead took sides with Zachery or disappeared altogether. Though she wanted to clear the air with the truth, she distinctly heard God tell her not to defend herself to the public, that He would fight her battle.

“She was being drug through the dirt,” her twin sister, Rená Jones, says. “She could have put [Zachery] on blast at any moment, but she would never do that. You never heard a public sound bite of her saying something negative about him.”

Once again, this was anything but an easy choice. During the two years of separation—what Riva describes as a time she and Zachery were “still married but living as though we were divorced”—the wounds of rejection and abandonment led Riva into deep depression. Despite days when she felt as if she couldn’t get out of bed, she knew she could cling to God. She didn’t understand why He had allowed her world to be turned upside-down, nor did the pain subside; but she continued to seek the Lord in prayer and devour His Word. And in response, she watched God show up in miraculous ways as she re-entered the secular working world and essentially raised her children alone.

“In my rejected state I learned to depend on God,” she says. “The finances I used to have were gone. Many of the friends I thought I had were gone. Yet God became my daily bread. He remained close, and He remained real when nothing else was making sense.”

A handful of friends stood by her side, covering her in prayer when she was too weak to fight for herself. Among those to show her support was Isaac Pitre, who had been friends with Riva and Zachery for years. Though the senior pastor of Christ Nations Church in Texarkana, Texas, was shocked by the scandalous events, he wasn’t surprised to see Riva respond with such spiritual maturity and grace.

“She is such a woman of God, and I know it might have been a struggle for her, but at the end of the day I knew she would do what was honorable, even in the midst of that,” Pitre says. “She would always keep the high ground and the high road, in that she would always honor God.”

The Fruit of Forgiveness
Over time, that impetus to honor God propelled Riva into an unwelcomed but necessary stage for true healing: forgiving her husband. First, she had to face a harsh reality, highlighted when a close friend bluntly asked her: “So what was your role in the breakdown of your marriage?”

“That was eye-opening to me, because at that point I was self-righteous; I was the victim,” Riva says. “But actually I was an enabler. I allowed certain things to go on longer than they should have. I regressed when I should have stood up more.”

Riva is also upfront in her new book about the fear that kept her silent when she knew God was instructing her to speak out, or that kept her caring more about her husband’s desires than God’s. 

“I had completely submitted to man but not to God,” she admits.

As God strengthened her and drew her closer to Him, the unexpected occurred: She began to see Zachery and her situation in a different light. No longer did she see herself as the victim but rather a victor through Christ. Though it was a grueling journey at times, Riva obeyed the Holy Spirit’s promptings to pray for her husband, even as news of more affairs grew.

“When someone divorces, that part of your prayer life for that person doesn’t change. You still are mandated to pray for that person,” she says. “My prayer for him was that he would be completely restored and whole again, and all that other stuff, like the deception, would be gone.”

As forgiveness began to rise in Riva, she also gained a strong compassion for other couples affected by adultery. Women and men alike began approaching her for advice on how to forgive their spouses or loved ones and live to their fullest. Seeing the need for this type of ministry in the body of Christ, Riva was inspired to write When It All Falls Apart.

“These people want that same kind of power,” she says. “It’s not an easy place to be, but I’m able to minister to them as to how to walk through it and fight for their marriage.”

While Riva continued to battle for her own marriage, she failed to see the same resolve in Zachery. “God’s highest call is for us to reconcile; it’s not divorce. If He sees an issue, He reveals it to heal it,” she says. “We wanted to see that process of restoration take place [with Zachery], but during those two years, we didn’t see it.”

Riva says she officially filed for divorce in 2009 after learning of Zachery’s ongoing extramarital affairs. 

“Her grace through the whole thing was just astounding,” Chukwuemeka says. “She never stopped trying to be strong for her children. She never stopped trying to be strong for the church and for her husband.”

As strong as Riva was becoming in her brokenness before the Lord, her return to church leadership was seemingly out of the question. Though she was frequently contacted to minister publicly, she’d resigned that she would never again pastor a church. 

God, of course, had other plans.

What started as an outreach ministry to help Orlando’s hurting and destitute people quickly evolved into a full-blown church. Jones can attest that it wasn’t easy for Riva when she heard the Lord telling her to begin Majestic Life Ministries.

“She sought much counsel and prayer and guidance. She didn’t just do it willy-nilly,” Jones says of her sisters’ decision. “It was directly from hearing God say to do it. And she knew she had to because He told her to do it. So it was definitely by faith.”

With $700 in the bank Riva opened the doors to Majestic Life with a vision to minister, mentor, motivate and mature people for the majestic life. In two years the church has bloomed to 300 members—without any advertising—and includes a nationally recognized healing room and a strong deliverance ministry. In typical redemptive fashion, God has used Riva’s life and ministry to establish a safe place for healing; congregants consistently minister to the down-and-out, even when those they’re trying to love reject them.

That was the case with Sonia Vega, a 28-year-old former lesbian who says it was a team effort that helped her leave the homosexual lifestyle when she joined Majestic Life almost two years ago. She credits Riva and other women for teaching her how to stand strong spiritually and how to walk and talk as a lady.

“They actually took me by the hand and walked me through the process,” Vega says. “With my background, a lot of people tend to shy away from me. But no matter how I looked or no matter how much I fought them, they still loved me back.”

Vega and others are living evidence of how God has used Riva’s painful journey to bring new life to others. Yet the Majestic Life pastor has also seen God’s hand moving to rebuild the physical ministry vehicles she once lost. First, a pastor gave her the lease to a fully functioning church building; then Majestic Life was able to raise $95,000 to furnish the facility in one year; and most recently the ministry received an amazing deal to broadcast on a local radio station five times a week.

Edith Young, a former pastor, points to Riva’s character as a key to this season of blessing. Though she’s known Riva since 2005, she joined Majestic Life after witnessing Riva actually live out what she preached: “The integrity that I’ve seen in her life over the years and just her character and how she lives what she preaches—that is very important to me.”

Not a Fairy Tale Ending
Two years since her public ministry has been seemingly reborn, Riva is often overwhelmed by God’s faithfulness as she witnesses Isaiah 61:2-3 in action in her life. She says God has truly given her “beauty for ashes” and “joy for mourning.”

But her faith was tried again—this time in an unprecedented way—on a cloudless Sunday morning last August that soon grew dark for Riva. As she walked into church, Riva had received word of Zachery’s death, ironically, via her ex-husband’s girlfriend. She returned home to verify the information with a New York morgue and inform her children. Once again, she found herself grieving the loss of a man she had spent more than half her life with.

“He was gone, and for me, it was too final,” she says soberly. “I had already been in a place of forgiveness; we were already healed. But at the same time I had a connection with him because I had been with him longer than I had been without him. It was just too final.”

The one piece of solace Riva could cling to was the trip she, Zachery, their children and her mother-in-law took to Puerto Rico a mere week before he died. The family was able to be together one last time before his passing. Riva recalls the familiarity she felt as the two talked and laughed together one final time: “I was able to see him, and it was like we were all together as a family. And the kids will have that memory as well. I think that was the hand of the Lord.”

Riva took off a month from preaching to grieve and be with her children. It was a difficult time, but she knew God would once again see her through it. She now endeavors to start a center with her ex-husband’s name for ministers who need a place to recoup and heal.

Yet since then she’s also had to deal with ongoing drama surrounding the church she co-founded. After publicly addressing NDCC members in the days following Zachery’s death, questions arose about Riva’s possible return as pastor. But in December, the church’s board of directors reportedly shunned her from being part of the search for a new pastor—a search in which Bishop I.V. Hillard, who was asked to help oversee the selection, publicly resigned from a process he claimed was “deceptive and that compromises previously agreed upon procedures and protocol.” And when Paula White of Without Walls International Church in Tampa, Fla., was abruptly named as senior pastor of NDCC, church members and ministry associates alike protested the decision while questioning White’s integrity in the process.

Riva did more than protest; she filed a lawsuit against NDCC’s board of directors and White to challenge White’s selection. The board claimed Riva’s case had no legal standing given a marriage settlement agreement she signed in 2009, and less than a week later, she dropped the suit. Still, the confusion surrounding NDCC lingers with no resolve—much like the facts regarding Zachery’s death.

This soap opera-like atmosphere may be new for Riva, but the reminders of death’s sting are not. Just as she grieved the divorce from the man she thought she’d grow old with, just as she grieved the sudden loss of her children’s father, she now grieves the turmoil within a congregation she helped to birth.

Yet if anyone can attest to God’s power to turn grief into joy and bring life from death, it’s Riva Tims. 

“That’s who she is,” Chukwuemeka says. “She’s been faithful to every aspect of her being. She is here now and she is the woman that God wanted her to be. I just know that she’s on the way up and God’s going to restore everything that the enemy took from her. It was a lot—and yet she’s only sown kindness.” 

Felicia Abraham is the associate editor for Charisma. She visited Majestic Life Ministries to file this report.

When It All Falls Apart

If you expected Riva Tims to air out her ex-husband’s dirty laundry in her new book, When It All Falls Apart, think again. Riva’s uplifting account blends the details of her painful story with powerful teaching to point readers toward God’s process for true healing and wholeness. Here’s a sampling from the book, which will be available next month online and in bookstores across the nation.

I remember sitting on my bed in the home I’d just moved into, thinking, “It’s official.” The divorce was not final, but I could sense the marriage was over. I felt completely uncovered. The new home had no window treatments yet, so as night fell the darkness encroached into our home. I felt a similar darkness invading my heart. My children and I were now on our own to make do with what we had. How would I make it alone? My husband was all I had known. Darkness continued to fill our house, still cluttered with unpacked boxes. Like a child, I wanted to sleep with a night light.

As it grew darker outside, it seemed to grow darker in my heart. I recall inviting all the children to come sleep in Mommy’s room. Unfortunately, they had grown out of that stage and basically looked at me as if I was crazy. They were each used to sleeping alone; I was not. I kept the television and the lights on all night to drive away the dark loneliness.

Death, financial collapse and betrayal can leave us feeling lonely in heart and mind. As a result, reality becomes hard to discern, heightening feelings of uncertainty, especially at night. In the night, the world grows quiet and time seems to slow. It is when you come face-to-face with your thoughts and hurts. In the night friends and family are not easily accessible. Spirits of discouragement and depression flourish as fear tightens its grip.

I had to learn how to maneuver through the night alone. My bed was no longer a place of rest, comfort and love. Night became agonizing, even unbearable. I developed more compassion for those who turn to alcohol, promiscuity or prescription drugs to deal with crisis. I thank God for Christ; He became my sword and shield. When I finally stopped crying, I developed a different kind of closeness to my Master, and He gave me comfort and peace.

The transformative lesson God taught me in that dark hour is that the morning will come when you learn how to endure the night. To endure means to suffer or tolerate. I didn’t want to suffer or tolerate the night, but that only delayed my morning.

To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh. —2 Corinthians 12:7

The purpose of the thorn in the flesh, Paul says, is to keep us from being conceited because of God’s unusual blessing. In Paul’s case it was because of “surpassing great revelations.”

If you say, “I don’t have a thorn in the flesh,” then I don’t suggest you pray, “O, please, Lord, give me one!” I can tell you right now that it is nothing for which you should stand in a line. It is nothing that you pray to get; you will pray to get rid of it. I don’t wish it on anybody.

The first qualification for the thorn in the flesh is the fact that the Lord has been extraordinarily good to you. If He has been unusually good to you—you qualify. Is that you? It may not be “visions and revelations from the Lord” (2 Cor. 12:1), but it is nonetheless an equivalent dose of sovereign grace, so wonderful that it is humbling for you to contemplate.

The second prerequisite is that one of your weaknesses happens to be that you tend to take yourself too seriously. If you immediately say, “That’s not me,” then I doubt that this is true. We are talking here about a thing called “pride.” We are talking about a sensitive ego. So if you are sure you don’t have a problem where pride is concerned, then there is no problem for you! Congratulations! You will not have a thorn in the flesh. You are exempt, so forget it.

Now I don’t want to be unfair, but if you think you don’t have a problem with pride, then you show you have no conviction of sin. The more you are convicted of sin, and the more you see of God’s glory, then the more you will see how proud you are. At first you say, “I’m not that bad,” and later you say, “I’m horrible.” God peels the layers away—that is why you need a thorn in the flesh.

Excerpted from The Thorn in the Flesh (Charisma House, 2004).

By faith the people passed through the Red Sea as on dry land; but when the Egyptians tried to do so, they were drowned. —Hebrews 11:29

God has a way of bringing our options down to one. He has a way of securing the response to His Word down to one. God did not lead the children of Israel through the land of the Philistines, lest they turn back altogether. He wanted instead to bring them to the place where they would have no choice but to turn utterly to Him. That was “the crunch”—not turning back.

There was nothing to do but to lift up that rod—and watch God do the rest. Moses may have thought, I’ve never done this before. I may look like a fool, but here it goes! Up the rod went. Across the wind came. God did the rest.

They didn’t swim across. They walked. They didn’t run. They walked. They enjoyed the spectacular sight up close. Some were given the honor of carrying the bones of Joseph. They had pockets full of loot, jewels, valuables. Parents would say to their children, “Take a close look at this. This is our God at work. Don’t ever forget it.” Pharaoh, in the meantime, made the most unwise calculation to be seen among the Egyptians yet. What was it? The Egyptians thought that they could do what the children of Israel had done.

Their most fatal error was trying to continue the pursuit of Israel across the Red Sea, but they realized it too late. For the same pillar of fire and cloud that had been Israel’s guidance became Egypt’s confusion.

The rod that was used to deliver Israel was used to condemn the Egyptians. The same Word that saves some will condemn others. Faith does what cannot be done by those who do not believe. And yet, faith also does what crying to God cannot do. There comes a time that we must act, do, obey. Lift up your rod. If that is what God has told you to do, nothing else will happen until you do it. Doing it is faith.

Excerpted from Believing God (MorningStar Publications & Ministries, 1997).