The Flathead Electric Co-op Annual Meeting is not a really fun place to spend an entire Saturday morning, but that is where my daughter and I trudged off to at 8:30 last Saturday. They were doing a drawing at the very end of the meeting for two $500 scholarships for graduating seniors, and we figured it was worth a few hours of our time to take a chance on her winning one of those.

For the entire meeting I kept looking at the last line on the program that said “drawing for scholarships.” We had seen about a dozen cards in the drawing box, so we felt the odds were good for her to win.

I remembered what I heard a woman say before she played a game once.

“My strategy is to pray for luck,” she said.

And I thought, “Do prayer and luck go together?“

Should I pray for my daughter to be lucky in this drawing? Do God and odds mesh?

In Isaiah 48:17 God says:

Thus says the Lord, your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: I am the Lord your God, who teaches you to profit, who leads you in the way you should go.

In the end, Jayme didn’t win the scholarship, although she received a beautifully engraved pie server that says Flathead Electric on it. I’m sure this will become a family heirloom.

On the way home I told her, “It would be a really, really depressing life if all we had was luck. Just beating the odds by chance. Very depressing.”

But we have God.

GOD DIRECTS.

Luck is random.

GOD DOES WHAT IS BEST FOR YOU.

Chance isn’t a someone who cares.

God plans a specific way my daughter should go. A specific college. A specific way to pay for it. A specific best plan for her in a specific direction.

One time I was doing something in the vicinity of my pastor, and I said, “Third time’s a charm!” 

He looked at me very sternly and said, “We are not people who believe in charms.”

Maybe the best secret to trusting God with our lives is to start using language that expresses a trust in God. We need to ditch any expressions that have to do with luck or chance and start practicing expressions like “If the Lord wills” or “We will attend the electricity meeting and see what the Lord does in this situation.”

What do you hope for? What do you need?

Do you speak of it with the language of luck or the language of faith? 

What a joy to have the Almighty God of the universe purposefully managing our lives. And I do believe he has a bit of a flare for beating the odds.

Epilogue: My daughter will finish college in two semesters, and she has yet to take out any student loans. That’s God’s doing right there.

Christy Fitzwater is the author of A Study of Psalm 25: Seven Actions to Take When Life Gets Hard. She is a blogger, pastor’s wife and mom of two teenagers and resides in Montana. Visit  for more information about her ministry.

In the days and weeks ahead, prophetic voices around the world will release prophecies for 2015. You’ll read a handful of them on the “Prophetic Insight” section of .

But before we charge ahead to weigh prophetic mandates, directives and warnings for 2015, let’s take a minute to look back at the prophetic words declared over 2014. After all, you can’t always limit God’s words to a 12-month timeline.

As I’ve said before, it’s possible that some 2014 prophecies won’t be relevant for years and others will remain relevant for years to come. So, again, before we move on to the next new prophetic word, let’s review what prophetic voices declared last year and respond according to His Spirit.

An Unlocking and Shaking

About this time last year, Chuck Pierce released a prophetic word that indicated a clock was ticking and gave a three-year timeline on this utterance. “You’ll hear of shakings from North to West! You’ll hear that I have come from Alaska to Maine to shake but it will be the center of this nation that I now shake, saith the Lord,” Pierce declared. “And I will cause that which has been hidden and controlling the forces of this land to shake down!” When you read the entire prophetic word, you’ll find it’s at the same time sober and encouraging. Some of it is purely in line with Scripture and appear to be unfolding. Some portions of the prophecy remain to be seen. Clearly, there’s a shaking going on. Are you prepared for what may happen in the next couple of years?

The Righteous Shall Never be Shaken

With regard to 2014, the Lord told Jennifer LeClaire (that’s me) that the righteous will never be shaken. We saw plenty of shaking going on not only in the world—but also in the body of Christ—as high-profile leaders (and unknown pastors) fell one after another to sexual immorality and various other unrighteous scandals. We also saw several denominations defy God’s Word as apostasy in the church continued rising. Those involved in unrighteous activities were shaken—and shaken hard. It seems judgment continued in the house of God this year.

The Year of God’s Goodness

Matt Sorger prophesied 2014 would be a year where the body of Christ walks into the manifest goodness of God. “The Lord spoke to me that He was closing old doors and opening new ones. The doors of your past, He is closing and sealing with the blood, never to be opened again. And He is opening a new door in front of you, a door that will lead you into the goodness of God,” Sorger said. “This year will be a year where you not only believe by faith to see the negative turn for your good, but you will walk into the manifestation of it. This will be a year where the goodness of God is manifested in your life.” Did you see the goodness of God manifest in your life in 2014? I know I did.

2014 Is a Roller Coaster Year

Rick Joyner said when he prayed over 2014 he saw a roller coaster: “This means we will have ups and downs this year. I realize that hardly takes a prophet to predict, but the encouraging thing about this vision was that the ride ended at the highest point,” he said. “We’re going higher this year! So don’t be discouraged by the dips. Hang on, and know that we will be going up again soon.” There’s more to the prophecy than that, but the roller coaster vision is telling. Did you experience a roller coaster year? I know I did.

A Second Phase of God’s ‘Prophetic Breath’

Bishop Bill Hamon, founder of Christian International, delivered a prophetic word for 2014 about a second phase of God’s prophetic breath during what many called the Year of the Open Door. Watch the video and decide for yourself if this prophetic word manifested in 2014. I know I witnessed a number of young prophetic voices rising up in the past year.

The Year of the Quantum Leap

Jane Hamon prophesied 2014 would be the “year of the quantum leap.” “I think we have all come to realize that God’s ‘suddenlies’ don’t always happen suddenly,” she said. “But we are now in a quantum leap ‘suddenly season,’ where we will see those things we have prayed over, decreed to, quoted Scriptures for, prophesied into and warred a good warfare for suddenly come to pass.” This was absolutely true in my own life. What about yours?

5 Prophetic Insights for 2014 and Beyond

James Goll prophesied it’s a time of fire, a call to all watchman to be on the alert, a coming increased detail in the word of knowledge, the release of redemptive interpreters and hope ambassadors, and restoration. “This is part of what I have been hearing, sensing, seeing and knowing that the Holy Spirit is doing in this hour. We each only see in part, and even the best only prophesy in part,” he said. “But when we each bring our piece of the puzzle to the table, we will see with greater clarity the vision of things to come.” Did you see any of this in 2014? Are you expecting it in 2015?

Stay tuned in the coming days and weeks as we’ll share more prophetic words. In the meantime, review these decrees, announcements, insights and directives. Grab what rings with your spirit even as you prepare your heart to receive what God has for you in the new year.

Jennifer LeClaire is senior news editor of Charisma. She is also director of Awakening House of Prayer in Fort Lauderdale and author of several books, including Satan’s Deadly Trio: Defeating the Deceptions of Jezebel, Religion and Witchcraft, and The Spiritual Warrior’s Guide to Defeating Jezebel. You can visit her website here. You can also join Jennifer on Facebook or follow her on Twitter.

“Therefore comfort one other with these words” (1 Thess. 4:18).

As I have meditated on the wondrous nativity story this Christmas, I have been struck by Elizabeth’s response to her pregnancy after a lifetime of being barren. In Luke 1:25 she bears witness, “The Lord has done this for me. … In these days he has shown his favor and taken away my disgrace among the people.”

Through her words I glimpsed a lifetime of pain.  Of humiliation.  Of agonizing tears.  A lifetime of heart-rending, unanswered prayers.  Yet through it all she had been “righteous before God, walking in all the commandments and ordinances of the Lord blamelessly” (Luke 1:6). She trusted the one whose will is always best, even when she didn’t understand.

God’s purpose for Elizabeth involved withholding children from her. Not because He didn’t care or was mean or was deaf to her pleas, but because He had singled her out to be the mother of a man who would be the first prophet in Israel after 400 years of heaven’s silence. Elizabeth’s son was the cousin of Jesus and the forerunner to the Messiah. A man Jesus said was as great as any man who was ever born. Her son was John the Baptist.  If we could ask Elizabeth today, I believe she would say the son God gave her was well worth the wait. Sometimes God withholds from us that for which we are desperate. Because He has some greater, unseen purpose. 

This week, He withheld life and breath from my dear friend and colleague Caryn Sadowski Lavin. Caryn was the co-producer of every one of our domestic Just Give Me Jesus Revivals, beginning with Knoxville, Tennessee, in 2000, and ending with Indianapolis in 2012.  When changes on our ministry team occurred leaving me with no director for our two last revivals, which were already in process, Caryn stepped in with her co-producer, Dan Brunelle, guaranteeing that all would be well.  And it was. Tens of thousands of people have come to the cross and had a personal, fresh encounter with God because of Caryn’s faithfulness to “do the work” with heartfelt excellence, as unto the Lord.

Caryn was a spectacularly beautiful child of God inside as well as out. When she was rushed to the hospital on Nov. 14 in a medical emergency, our prayers ascended to the gates of heaven in a spiritual tidal wave of desperate love and concern. We were specific. Earnest.  Persistent as we pled for God’s mercy. But our prayers for her healing went unanswered. Caryn’s faith became sight on Dec. 22 when she opened her eyes to the face of Jesus. She has moved to our Father’s House. And we are left trying to make sense of the senseless. Why? Which is one reason Elizabeth’s words keep coming to my mind, along with those of Jesus to Martha: “Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?” (John 11:40) My response?  I believe!  I believe God has a greater purpose than that which I can see. This is a time to trust Him when I just don’t understand.  And it’s a time to pray for God’s presence, peace and comfort for her husband, Tom, and those she has left behind.

So with tears on my face, I am praising Elizabeth’s God for the baby of Bethlehem who brings blessing from brokenness … and hope from grief … and life from death. In His time.

 Anne Graham Lotz is the founder of AnGeL Ministries. She is also the author of several books, Heaven: God’s Promise for Me and Heaven: My Father’s House.

 Click here to listen.

Jennifer LeClaire is senior editor of Charisma. She is also director of Awakening House of Prayer in Fort Lauderdale and author of several books, including Satan’s Deadly Trio: Defeating the Deceptions of Jezebel, Religion and Witchcraft, and The Spiritual Warrior’s Guide to Defeating Jezebel. You can visit her website here. You can also join Jennifer on Facebook or follow her on Twitter.

Are you a dreamer? Do you have dreams by night and visions by day? Jane Hamon, bishop Bill Hamon’s daughter-in-law, comes from a community of prophetic people and has studied biblical dream interpretation for many years. Glean from her experience and get a better understanding of how God speaks to us through dreams.

Jennifer LeClaire is senior editor of Charisma.

Whether it’s things, people or our dreams, loss comes to us in many ways. Life is never quite the way we imagine it to be.

But loss is not going from having to not having; it’s going from one thing to a new thing.

Paul understood that he had to lose everything to gain Christ (see Phil. 3:7-8). He could no longer trust in people, things or his own ideals but had to put his trust in God. His willingness to lose himself transformed him from Saul to Paul.

Jesus transformed death (loss) into new life. This is the model He gave us—embrace loss. Don’t try to avoid or deny it.

Ever since the fall we have been trying to get back to the Garden of Eden. We long for that perfect place of rest, peace and intimate connection with God and each other.

Thankfully, Jesus came to show us how to find that connection. He tells us we must lose our lives to find them (see Matt. 16:25).

This is radical thinking. The challenge is not to fear loss but to embrace it so you can find the new thing. That way you will not be dependent on people, things or your ideals to meet the needs of your soul.

We must be dependent on God and nothing else. Our every hope lies in Him.

Michael W. Smith, Recording Artist

The Spirit of Christmas, Worship, Sovereign

I have about a thousand great Christmas memories. It’s a pretty important day around our house. It’s our favorite time of the year.

The first thing that comes to my mind is when we visited a nursing home. Our family had always tried to support food banks through the church to help people who were having financial difficulty.

When our kids were younger, I’ll never forget it because we had already moved to Franklin, Tennessee. We all went to the nursing home on Christmas Eve and hung out with these people. I watched it truly impact my kids. In the midst of all the parties and all these people coming over to our house for a Christmas party we have every year—that’s the one that, when we left there, I remember going, “That’s what it’s all about, guys, what we just did. We went and loved on people. We loved on a bunch of people whose relatives don’t come and see them. They’ve just been abandoned.”

To watch these old men and women light up and just be thrilled that my little kids were around—they were like 6, 8, 10, 12 and 14—it was a game-changer for us, and we continued to do that throughout the years. But that first one was monumental to me, and I’ll never forget it.

Pat Schatzline, Evangelist/Author

Why Is God So Mad at Me?, I Am Remnant

In December 2003, our home and ministry was located in Fayetteville, North Carolina, and it seemed to me to be more beautiful than ever. Why? Because a gift had arrived at our home from heaven.

In the previous years, Christmas was a wonderful time of growing as a family and opening presents, and a time to catch our breath. But this year was different. Christmas changed in the Schatzline home.

It had been just two months since my wife (Karen), our 11-year-old son (Nate) and I had traveled all the way to China to bring our daughter, Abby, home from an orphanage. Abby was nine months old when we got her. The adoption was long and arduous, but finally she was at home. There was now a miracle living in our home!

She was full of wonder at the new sights and sounds. No longer did she share a bed with three other children. No longer would her future be in question. She had come home! Now she was experiencing the lights, the tree, the toys, Santa’s lap (which really scared her) and the Christmas spirit—but most of all a home full of love! A home where Jesus was King and safety was the norm.

Abby was too young to remember that Christmas, but for our family, it was the year that Christmas was no longer about us but the gift God had given us. Abby is 11 years old now and she can’t sleep on Christmas Eve because of the excitement! She takes after her dad!

Martha Rogers, Author

Best Laid Plans, Love Stays True

One Christmas memory that really stands out in my mind is the Christmas our second son was born. Robert Allen Rogers was due on Feb. 6, but at my doctor’s appointment on Dec. 5, the doctor became concerned. He told me to rest, stay off my feet as much as possible and not do any heavy physical labor until the next appointment, which was in two weeks.

With Christmas drawing near and a toddler at home, I tried to do as instructed. On Dec. 10, I decided to go downtown for an hour of shopping before picking up my husband. I felt fine until we were on the way home and stopped at the grocery store.

While there, I began hemorrhaging, and we rushed to the emergency room. An emergency C-section saved my life, but the baby was in trouble because his lungs hadn’t fully developed. Prayer requests went out to our church family, and many came to pray with us.

Robert was born on Monday, with little hope of survival at less than 4 pounds, but on Thursday his lungs miraculously inflated and he began breathing on his own. Later we learned that a group of women had been on their knees for several hours Wednesday night praying for his lungs to work on their own.

God answered our prayers, and a few days before Christmas, we were able to take him home. What a joyous Christmas that was! He is a strong healthy man now with two sons of his own.

Kirk Cameron, Actor/Author/Speaker

Unstoppable, Saving Christmas, Fireproof

I love Christmas. I love everything about it. It’s my favorite time of year. I’m a sucker for every bit of Christmastime. I love the cookies. I love the stockings, the music, the carols. I love the cold weather. I love the sweaters. I love getting around a fire with your kids. I love the Christmas stories. I love St. Nick. I love Christmas trees, and I love the birth of Christ.

I have so many great memories growing up as a kid—when I was little, putting carrots and a glass of milk with chocolate chip cookies out for Santa and the reindeer. I remember the first time I learned that Christmas was really about the birth of Christ. I didn’t grow up in a Christian home, so I didn’t know what a Nativity was. I had no idea that Jesus Christ had anything to do with Christmas, so I remember when I turned 18 years old, someone explained to me who these three wise men were and the baby in the manger. I didn’t understand any of that. That was a profound Christmas memory for me.

I also remember the first Christmas with my girlfriend, Chelsea. It was that Christmas that I had the ring in my pocket I was going to give her on Christmas Eve, but I got cold feet and I waited until New Year’s Eve to ask her to marry me. I was going to do it right there with my family and everybody. We were celebrating Christmas together in New York. I chickened out on Christmas Eve. On New Year’s Eve, I finally gave her the Christmas present, which was an engagement ring.

Lena Nelson Dooley, Author

Maggie’s Journey, Mary’s Blessing

When I first read it in high school, The Gift of the Magi became my favorite short story. Then, about four years into our marriage, my husband and I experienced something similar.

We had two children, and money was tight. I saved a little bit out of my grocery money each week planning to buy a power saw for James. He had loved woodwork in school. I wanted to get him something that he would enjoy. It was going to be his Christmas.

Imagine my surprise when he had a large wrapped package under our tree for me. When I ripped off the paper, I was amazed. He had saved all year to make it my Christmas. He’d bought me a record player with large speakers so I could use the records I’d collected during college.

Each of us had focused on the needs of the other person, and each of us was doubly blessed. First, because we had focused on the one we loved all year, knowing in our hearts that we were going to surprise the other. Second, because we felt the love poured out on ourselves, setting the tone for the rest of our almost-50-year-long marriage.

Paul Baloche, Worship Leader

“Open the Eyes of My Heart,” “Above All,” “Your Name”

My favorite recollections of Christmas begin with an appreciation for the fact that my parents created memories for us year after year, memories that I will always cherish.

Growing up in South Jersey, across the bridge from Philadelphia, we were part of a blue-collar Catholic community, where much of life was centered on the church. In those days, we dressed up in our finest to attend midnight mass. I remember being up past my bedtime, dressed in my tie and wingtips. I felt like a little man ascending the church steps.

We would all attend mass as a family with parishioners from all over our little town crushed into pews, shoulder-to-shoulder, singing loudly the familiar songs of the season. The magic, mystery, the wonder of the candles, decorations, poinsettias, hay and the crèche and Nativity statues displayed carefully around the altar — all evoked a sense of wonder.

After returning home, it was hard to go to sleep knowing that, in a few hours, we’d all wake up to presents under the tree. That morning, my Aunt Elise and Uncle Harry would arrive, and my dad would break out his old 16-millimeter camera with the blinding lights.

I have tried to create similar traditions with my own family over the years, and I hope that my children carry the same joyful memories in their hearts.

Cherie Calbom, Author

The Juice Lady’s Turbo Diet, The Juice Lady’s Living Food Revolution

I have always loved Christmas. It’s my favorite time of the year. But there was one Christmas in my early 20s when I was very down and couldn’t find the joy of Christmas—no boyfriend, no immediate family in Southern California, nothing special going on.

I couldn’t shake the dark cloud of loneliness as I sat staring at my tree. What could I do to get out of this blue mood? Help a family in need! That was an interesting, out-of-the-blue thought.

I made some calls and learned about a single father with a couple of children who had nothing for Christmas, not even a tree. It was only a few days until Christmas, so I sprang into action. Though I didn’t have a lot of money, I took all I had and bought presents, a tree and anything else I could think of to make a great Christmas dinner. What fun it was!

I drove up to their house with the tree tied to my car’s roof. I packed up presents and made my way to their door. The whole family was excited, but the little girl was especially thrilled to have Christmas come to her home. After everything was unloaded and wishes and goodbyes were said, I drove away with a completely different outlook on the holiday season. It truly was more blessed to give than receive. My heart was filled with joy.

I’ve had decades of Christmases with my husband, surrounded by extended family, dogs barking, people laughing and the warmth of family and friends. Yet there’s one Christmas that always stands out in my mind—that Christmas long ago when I gave nearly all I had to help a family in need. That’s the spirit of the season, when we celebrate the one who gave everything He had to save a world in need.

Beth Shriver, Author

Rumspringa’s Hope, Annie’s Truth

I was very close to both my grandmothers as I grew up and later when we all lived in the Denver metro area for many years. My children loved going to their homes every Christmas because they were filled with things they weren’t familiar with, things of the past, heirlooms and black-and-white pictures of unsmiling faces who were their ancestors. It piqued their curiosity and opened a new world for them to see Grandma Maurine darn a sock or crochet a blanket for them, instead of throw it away or buy one. She was a master storyteller, so I told her to write down these stories. She did and had them published to give to each of her seven children. They later returned the favor and gathered their memories together and had the book published for her Christmas present. I use some of their stories in my books. This grandma was a prankster who loved a good joke. She played five instruments and was runner-up in the Miss Senior Colorado Contest.

In her younger years, my Grandma Isal taught in a one-room schoolhouse and was able to tell the story of baby Jesus born in a manger. Later, she lived on a ranch and made the best Christmas dinner ever!

Remembering all of this made me realize all over again why I like writing about the Amish. It takes me back to my grandparents’ ranch and to the farm my dad grew up on. Riding horses and pretending we were cowgirls or cowboys if my cousins were there—winters riding in the sleigh and summers swimming in the river. And there’s no better place to play hide-and-seek than a farm. We worked hard and played hard.

I can still hear my grandmothers talk about the land and how they joined together as a family every day to do chores. It’s a lifestyle I’m glad I was able to experience. If I hadn’t, I wouldn’t be able to create that world in my writing.

Worship with Christmas songs from Michael W. Smith, Paul Baloche and others at

There are a number of things you can do to make family celebrations go smoothly.

It is that time of the year again. You know, the season between Thanksgiving and New Year’s. There are parties, special foods, decorations, vacation days, special events and services, and of course, family.

Does that word make you cringe?

Though many of us will happily make the trek home to join the family fun, others are growing more anxious as the holidays approach. For them, the family reunion is a step into dysfunction–something like appearing on their own Survivor reality show.

Let’s face it, most families don’t function like those in the 1950s sitcoms. The “show” they put on can create holiday angst–a gift no one wants to receive!

Most of my therapy discussion during this time of year centers on helping people prepare for family get-togethers. I’ll tell you what I tell my clients: You can make it! In fact, there are a number of things you can do to make family celebrations go smoothly no matter how dysfunctional your family is.

My first piece of advice is this–do not idealize the holidays. Be realistic and think through past holiday gatherings. Unless you’ve all been in intensive therapy for a while, the family performance will not be that different from what it was in years past. However, if you approach your family problems realistically, you can better prepare your reactions.

Here are a few tips that might help:

Focus on your reactions, not those of your relatives. Your reaction is the only thing you can control. Check your response to others and make sure you are behaving according to biblical guidelines even if they aren’t.

For example, if Uncle Jim corners you every year and criticizes you for your political views, and you previously responded with anger that led to a fight, instead say, “Uncle Jim, I can see you feel strongly about your views. That’s great!”

Don’t argue; drop the subject and diffuse him. Change your reaction because he probably won’t change his!

Before the visit, identify family patterns that cause you stress. Think of new ways to react to those patterns. For example, every year Mom complains to you about your sister. You find yourself in the middle of a mother-daughter conflict that has nothing to do with you.

Instead of talking with your mom about your sister, say: “Mom, you need to talk to my sister about this.” Keep redirecting her back to your sister no matter what she says. Get out of the middle of this “triangle.” You don’t want to be there!

Set limits if there are serious problems. If there is a history of abuse and the abusive behavior begins, be clear about your boundaries. If they are crossed, confront the behavior and leave.

Do not stay in your parents’ house during the visit. This is a strategy that has worked for many of my clients. You have more control over whatever is happening when you can come and go of your own volition.

Time away from the family home allows you to regroup, think about what is happening and plan your reaction. It also provides you with a safe place to stay if there are serious family problems.

Be a model of grace and forgiveness. As a Christian, you may have to extend both during a visit. This doesn’t mean you allow people to walk all over you. It means that when people treat you poorly, you address the behavior and then extend grace and forgive.

Don’t wait for them to do so first. And don’t allow offense and bitterness to take root.

Choose one thing you will do differently this year that will help make things better. Don’t try to change everything at once. Focus on one behavior. For example, “This year I am going to ignore Uncle Bob’s smart remarks about Christianity.”

Pray to imitate Christ in all you do and ask the Holy Spirit to help you overcome your urges to act ungodly. Small changes add up through the years.

Your family may have problems, but your Christian character and Holy Spirit empowerment can help you make it through holiday get-togethers. What an opportunity to do what Jesus did and love the unlovely!

The hardest question I’m asked right now—the very hardest question—is: “How are you?”

It’s not hard because my life is bad. It’s hard because I’m just feeling ... so many things. The range of emotions I feel on any given day swings wildly from calm and grateful to confused and frustrated.  

My family is blessed to be together on this road, but we are weary. Steve is weary. His body is used up and his spirit is struggling to stay comfortable in such ill-fitting skin. It’s almost like the inner Steve is growing as rapidly as the outer man is failing and like a baby outgrows the womb, the real Steve is ready to breathe the fresh air of real life. The process is the most beautiful and brutal thing I’ve ever witnessed.

We talk often and openly of heaven. In fact, we talk about it in ways that might make other people uncomfortable, but heaven is not a cheap consolation prize to us—it’s the best case scenario. We talk about the people he can’t wait to see (his dad, my grandpa, Wendell Smith).  

I talk about what the libraries must be like and how it must look right now, all decorated for Christmas, and he talks about the golf courses. Yesterday, as I was pouring yet another carton of vanilla formula through his feeding tube and realizing it’s been nearly 10 months since he’s tasted any food, we talked about how fun it will be to get breakfast in heaven. We are not afraid of heaven.

Our home is almost constantly filled with people. Hospice nurses, health aides, social workers. The caregivers who work for us and take such amazing care of Steve so that I have some breaks. Friends and family coming to say deep words. People dropping off dinners and groceries and flowers. I look forward to the day when my house is quiet and private again and I can be the one taking the casseroles and flowers to people I love, but until then I know for certain that we would be lost without this unbroken stream of support and sympathy. Just so lost.

Our kids are exactly as you might imagine. Tired. Heartbroken. Hopeful. Strong. They surround their dad like sentinels, marching as far and as long with him on this road through the Shadowlands as they can, knowing the path will eventually narrow and there will only be room for one. Until then, we march. And we write. And take photos. And say the words we need to say to honor the life of the man we love the most.

If you’ve read this far, you might be thinking, “She’s processing all of this so well.” False. I have never felt more weak, more inadequate or more overwhelmed. Steve’s needs are immense. The more care he needs, the fewer people there are who are able to give it. And though we are surrounded by such a brilliant army on this battlefield, I realize that everyone can opt in and out of the fight except for me.  

I don’t want to opt out, but there are moments when I am certain I will break beneath the weight of responsibility and the sorrow always bubbling like a pot of stew on the back burner. I am learning both how strong and how weak I am.  I am learning to receive help from those who can give it and make no apologies for the fact that I need it. I am learning to listen to the voices of those who have gone before me on this road without being defined  or confined by them. I am learning, now more than ever, to lean hard on the grace of Jesus.

So, that’s a little update from our world. I hope it breathes hope, because we really do feel that so much of the time. And the fact that we feel it any of the time during this fierce fight is nothing less than a Christmas miracle. Jesus, Emmanuel, came to our sad and broken world to bring endless, eternal hope. This is why our weary world rejoices. This is why we’re still able to dance in the kitchen. His love brings comfort and joy, and we are drinking it in this season and always.

Oh, how we love you,

Bo for Team Stern

“We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed; and always carrying around in the body the death of the Lord Jesus, that also the life of Jesus might be expressed in our bodies” (2 Cor. 4:9).

Bo Stern is a sought-after speaker and writer, and a teaching pastor at Westside Church in Bend, Oregon. She is passionately involved in raising awareness and funding for ALS (Lou Gehrig’s) research, with which her husband was diagnosed in 2011. For more info and to follow her story, visit .

“My soul magnifies the Lord, and my spirit rejoices in God my Savior” (Luke 1:46-47).

This Christmas, has a “storm” silenced your song? Storms of life do not defer to holidays, do they? In fact, holidays can seem to make the storms even more fierce since they come with so much additional activity and responsibility. I know. A storm has swept into our lives this Christmas season.

As I write this my beloved husband, Danny, is back in the hospital. This is our sixth December in seven years that he has had a medical emergency. While some have been more life-threatening than others, none have been easy. All have been stressful. Added to ministry responsibilities, preparations for Christmas and everyday family issues, the hospitalizations can seem like powerful storms.

My reaction to the storm has reminded me of the difference between a turkey and an eagle, which is dramatic when a storm threatens.  While the turkey runs under the barn and hides to stay safe, the eagle lets out a piercing scream as he spreads his wings, launches out into the wind, then uses the air currents to soar to higher and higher levels.

When storms burst into my life, I want to be an eagle, but sometimes in my spirit I’m a turkey. So I have a choice. I can either disengage from life, complain in my spirit, throw a pity-party, and hope the storms go away. Or I can spread my wings, allowing the challenges to take me into the stratosphere of faith as I trust my heavenly Father completely. Even when I don’t understand. In that rarefied atmosphere of total trust, I not only have peace, but a song in my heart.

Which is where the Christmas story comes in. Because it couldn’t have been easy for the young virgin from Nazareth who was pregnant, but not married; who delivered her baby in a stable, not a hospital or a home; who laid her newborn infant in a manger, not a cradle. Yet her heart sang the words above that have become a classic expression of joy and worship. This Christmas, in the midst of my storm, I have made them mine. Make them yours, too.