Experience told me they would balk at the assignment, so I rehearsed a pep talk that would bat away their complaints.

“Listen, guys,” I said. “I can translate this list of verbs in 33 seconds. I’m asking you to be able to do the same in less than 60 seconds. You can do this. All you need is the knowledge, which you already possess, and then a lot of practice. It’s challenging but do-able.”

After that impressive speech, my students began working on the verb study guide, and I gave an internal nod. We were going to get there together.

Later that day, I got a surprising word from the Lord. “Hey,” He said to me.

“Yes?” I said.

“You know that thing you’ve been asking Me about—that place where you keep losing control?”

“Yes.”

“Well, what you need is knowledge about the right way to act, which you already have, and then a lot of practice.”

Aaaaaaaggggggh. See what the Spirit did there? Turned my own pep talk against me.

I’m reading James 1:22 this morning, from my teacher perspective, and it’s making me cringe: “Be doers of the word and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.”

Do what it says. Do it.

Practice. Practice again.

Again. Again.

Practice sets the real students apart from the wannabes. Practice reveals itself on tests and in the grade book. Who actually did the work, and who just talked a good game?

“It’s hard!” say my students.

“Do it anyway,” I say. Of course it’s hard. You don’t translate 30-plus verbs in less than 60 seconds unless you’ve put in the time.

“It’s hard!” I say to the Lord.

The Spirit throws me a look and just says, “Yup.”

End of story. {eoa}

This article originally appeared at .

Emerging worship collective Influence Music is slated to release its debut album “Touching Heaven.” With millions of people engaging in the conversation since the group formed in April 2017, Influence Music has already garnered a solid fan base in less than a year. The movement has attracted some of LA’s most gifted songwriters, producers and creatives, including notable pop writers such as Georgia Ku (Skrillex, Martin Garrix, Iggy Izelia), Lauren Evens (Armen Van Buren) and Melody Noel (Jennifer Lopez, Prince Fox, Macy Gray). The creative collective has also garnered the participation of Dove Award nominee Matt Gilman and Michael Ketterer of United Pursuit.

Recorded live at Influence Church, “Touching Heaven” features 12 brand-new, original songs including the stand out track “I AM” that went viral on Facebook, gaining over 1 million views and 22,000 shares for its acoustic version, and new single “Proud” that has already garnered over 1 million streams on Spotify.

Influence Music’s Matt Gilman said about “Touching Heaven”: “These songs have brought about deep healing, refreshing, restoration and inspiration to our writers, artists and community. The vulnerability in these songs have allowed there to be a marriage between authenticity and creativity.”

Each track on the new album will be accompanied by a live performance music video, lyric video, story behind the song, and devotional. For fans looking for the live experience, Influence Church will host an album release concert on May 24 at 7 p.m. PDT that will also be available to watch via livestream on their Facebook page.

Influence Music is comprised of artists Matt Gilman, Melody Noel, Michael Ketterer and Whitney Medina. Look for Ketterer this spring as he makes his national TV debut as a singer-songwriter on the upcoming season of “America’s Got Talent” beginning May 29, 2018.

“Touching Heaven” complete track listing:

1. {[In Nomine Patris ]}
2. Touching Heaven
3. Kingdom
4. Mistakes
5. Why Not Now
6. Soli Deo Gloria
7. Breathe
8. I AM
9. City In The Sky
10. Proud
11. Spirit Lead Me
12. Rejoice

“Touching Heaven” will be available on Apple Music, Spotify, Amazon and anywhere else music is digitally sold.

A Jewish-Christian political party will be on the ballot for the first time in Israel’s next general election after the registrar recently approved the party.

Dennis Avi Lipkin founded the BibleBloc Party, which he says has been in the making for years.

“Our goal is to promote the Jewish-Christian alliance and togetherness,” Lipkin tells The Jerusalem Post. “For 2,000 years, Jews and Christians hated each other. When Israel faces an existential threat of Islamic terrorism, we need a Judeo-Christian love party.”

The Jerusalem Post reports the list will alternate between Jews and Christians, starting with Lipkin, followed by a Christian who lives in the Druse village of Usfiya. Part of the party’s platform will be to send Jewish and Christian supporters of Israel to speak on the country’s behalf around the world. The party will seek the support of non-Jewish Russian immigrants from the former Soviet Union and their spouses and Christian Arabs.

“The Biblical bloc protects everyone who believes in the Bible and opposes the ethnic cleansing of Jews and Christians from the land of Israel,” according to the Jewish Press. “The Biblical bloc represents parties all over the world who espouse Judeo-Christian, democratic Western culture.”

Esther Fleece Allen of Alliance for the Peace of Jerusalem says, “It is good to see someone like Avi Lipkin recognizes the level of support that non Jews bring to the vitality of Israel. The Alliance for the Peace of Jerusalem is committed to praying for all who seek the good of those who live in the Holy Land.”

The United States recently opened its embassy in Jerusalem to international protests.

The move was lauded as biblical prophetic fulfillment by many Christian leaders.

“We’re finally doing what we said we were going to do a quarter of a century ago and that is to move our embassy to Jerusalem. And then on another level is, I think America is coming into alignment with biblical truth. I mean this is, it doesn’t matter what the United States says—this is the capital Jerusalem. It was bought and paid for. David declared it to be the capital of Israel, and so I think we’re just coming into line and alignment with biblical truth,” retired Army Lt. Gen. Jerry Boykin says.

Israel is run by the Knesset, or general assembly.

According to the official Knesset website:

Israel has an electoral system based on nation-wide proportional representation, and the number of seats which every list receives in the Knesset is proportional to the number of voters who voted for it. The only limitation is the percent qualifying threshold. In other words, a party must receive at least percent of the votes in order to be elected. According to this system, the voters vote for a party list, and not for a particular person on the list. Since the institution of the primaries system in some of the parties, these parties directly elect their candidates for the Knesset. Some of the parties elect their candidates via the party’s institutions. In the ultra-religious parties their spiritual leaders appoint the candidates. The Knesset elections take place once every four years, but the Knesset or the Prime Minister can decide to hold early elections, and under certain circumstances can serve for more than four years. …

The contest in the elections is among lists of candidates. Since the Parties Law was passed in 1992, only a party, which has been legally registered with the Party Registrar, or an alignment of two or more registered parties, which have decided to run in the elections together, can present a list of candidates and participate in the elections. …

The candidates of any given list are elected to the Knesset on the basis of the order in which they appear on it. If a certain party received sufficient votes for 10 seats, the first 10 candidates on its list will enter the Knesset. If a Knesset member passes away or resigns his seat in the Knesset for whatever reason, the next on the list will replace him/her.

Like many, I am deeply concerned about school violence. A massive shift has occurred. Talking, chewing gum and making noise were the top three public school problems in the early 1960s. Currently, rape, robbery and assault could lead the list.

Education expert William Jeynes correlates the decline in public schools with the Supreme Court’s 1962 and 1963 decisions to remove Bible reading: “One can argue, and some have, that the decision by the Supreme Court­—in a series of three decisions back in 1962 and 1963­—to remove Bible and prayer from our public schools, may be the most spiritually significant event in our nation’s history over the course of the last 55 years.”

That decision had enormous implications that will continue unless we make drastic changes. Granted, how can we promote prayer in schools when prayer in the church is at an all-time low?

Tighter guns laws have some merit as long as law-abiding citizens are not restricted. However, guns are not the problem­—sin is the problem. Will we outlaw pipe fittings to prevent pipe bombs and cars to prevent road rage? Of course not. Cain killed Abel with a rock. The human heart is the problem.

1. Bring God back into the schools. I remember a time when we weren’t embarrassed about God. Teachers and administrators would willingly share their faith. Now, evolution is taught as fact, and God is portrayed as a fairy tale­—when in reality, evolution is a fairy tale and creation is a fact. In the same sense that this article did not write itself, we are not here by random chance. Kids need to know that they are made in the image of God and that their Creator loves them and will guide them if they turn to Him. Bringing God back into the schools will reverse everything from violence to bullying to depression.

Secular groups have been pushing their agenda far too long. “Separation of church and state” is their battle cry. The courts have misused the infamous “separation” phrase to ban religious activities, primarily those promoting Christian principles. Thomas Jefferson used the phrase in 1802 in a private letter written to the Baptist Association of Danbury, Connecticut. The Baptists feared that the government might try to regulate religious expression. They were assured that this would not happen. Ironically, we are seeing this today.

In other words, the people did not want the government imposing a national religion on the people. Jefferson wisely agreed with them. His statement was intended to protect religious expression by building a wall of separation between the church and the state; solidifying the fact that the federal government could not strike down religious freedoms. Ironically, the public school system was first introduced in the 1600s to teach kids the Bible. Scholars were born through Princeton and Yale. God was embraced, not replaced. America, wake up! We can unapologetically acknowledge the sovereign hand of God on our campuses. Acknowledgment is not establishment. I pray that local school districts don’t cave in to political correctness; difference makers should make a difference.

2. Allow hope onto the campus. When I inquired recently if pastors could help students after a local school shooting, I was told that they have many trained secular psychologists who can help. In short, pastors aren’t allowed on campuses. Remember, “separation of church and state.” The irony is that those who can offer lasting hope are not allowed on campuses. Granted, I’m not talking about being aggressive and proselytizing unwilling students. My recommendation is that (after a thorough vetting process), certain Christians are allowed on campus as encouragers and change agents, building up those who are bullied and offering hope to the hopeless.

3. Bring God back into our homes. As the family goes, so goes the nation. Violent video games and movies do nothing but foster violence. For example, in Grand Theft Auto, kids can have sex with a prostitute, take back the money and set her on fire. Parents, for the love of God, wake up. Turn off the media and invest in your children.

Ironically, the missing element that few want to talk about is the fact that most shooters are taking psychotropic drugs to deal with emotional pain. Therein lies one of the main problems. Homes resemble a volcano ready to erupt rather than a loving, nurturing environment. And our media choices instill fear, violence, and sexual perversion. In short, we are reaping what we are sowing in our homes.

Parents should be the spiritual leaders in our homes; our absence has caused an epidemic. The majority of youth suicides, runaways, rapists and high school dropouts are from fatherless homes. Also remember, we don’t have to leave home to be absent; we can check out mentally, emotionally and spiritually and lead our family astray. If we fail to train our children, society will do it for us.

Many who have been interviewed after a suicide attempt talk about feelings of hopelessness and helplessness. They see no way out. By bringing God back into our homes and schools, we can impact the next generation at a very deep level. Parents must repent of their apathy and turn completely to God to be changed from the inside out, which, in turn, will change the atmosphere of our homes, schools, and country.

We are witnessing the tragic results of people dying spiritually. We must point people to the true source of healing, or violence will only escalate. Xanax, OxyContin and Vicodin will never replace repentance, renewal and restoration through Jesus Christ. We have sown to the wind and are reaping the whirlwind. In addition to violence increasing, SAT scores have sunk to the lowest level since the college admission test was overhauled in 2005. Unless the Lord builds the house, he who labors, labors in vain. Unless the Lord builds the school, he who labors, labors in vain. {eoa}

More at

When is the last time you walked into a room full of people and all you thought about was them? How can I be a blessing to them, how can I make their day, how can I bring joy to their heart? How deep can a man go into selflessness where he is no longer concerned about himself, thinking of himself—thinking of ways to get ahead, to put himself in the best possible light in all conversations and appearances, to look good, to impress others and to project an image of himself that belies who he really is? Did Jesus ever live a day with that sort of mindset?

Why do men do this? Could this selfishness and self-focus be the larger part of what Jesus came to free us from?

“Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavily burdened, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn from Me. For I am meek and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light” (Matt. 11:28-30).

Is not self-consciousness the largest part of the bitter fruit of what the law produces? And is not cultivating a God-consciousness and beholding the glory of the Lord, as in a mirror, with your heart, the solution toward this sort of radical transformation Jesus came to bring? Is this not the bigger part of what it means to grow up into Him and mature? Is not coming to Him and learning of Him what produces selflessness in our lives and a blessed rest where we quit striving to be someone, to achieve something, to be great as the world counts greatness?

Here’s where much of the body of Christ is at today.

“For John came neither eating nor drinking, and they say, ‘He has a demon.’ The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, ‘Here is a gluttonous man, a drunkard, a friend of tax collectors and sinners.’ But wisdom is justified by her children” (Matt. 11:18-19).

Our actions often fail to justify that we are the children of God. We argue, we fuss and we constantly engage in doctrinal disputes. Many seem to be consistently looking to pick a fight, to grumble and complain about things, and to never be satisfied unless our own opinions and points of view are heard. Our strife and division are our most frequent and consistent witness to the world. But listen to what Jesus said:

“A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:34-35).

How did Jesus love us? He denied Himself totally and completely to reconcile us to God. He brought to us the highest life by a firm committal to His death on the cross. His deepest motivation was to go as low as He could go to lift us up as high as we could go—the lowest death producing the highest life. He endured this death because we were His joy.

“Let us look to Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God” (Heb. 12:2).

Should not this be our aim—to be like Him? To be conformed to His image? To love as He loved? How else will the world know that we are indeed Jesus’ disciples?

Many churches are known for many different things. Some are known for prophecy or their charismatic gifts, some for benevolence, some for their good singing or great preaching, etc. but how many are known for their love, not in word but in deed?

But it is the revelation that we are loved by Him that will ultimately produce the beginning of this transformation in our lives. We must constantly be receiving His love in order to release His love. The greatest glory we can experience on the earth is to know how loved we are by God. When we live loved, we will manifest His love to others.

When you truly commune with God you lose what you don’t need, and gain what you need in His presence. You lose those burdensome, weary, burned out physical and emotional feelings that come from constant striving, and you gain real rest in your soul that comes from His grace and knowing His love. This Scripture blesses me immensely and gives me a glimpse into real freedom:

“Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly” (Matt. 11:28, MSG).

Some Christians pray and worship regularly, read the Bible faithfully, attend church consistently and constantly show God how much they love Him, but still have no peace and mental freedom. What’s the problem?

The revelatory truth of how much they are loved by God has not yet gripped them. They see themselves through their own weaknesses and shortcomings instead of through the eyes of the love of Christ. Their pursuit of God is from a position of somehow trying to earn His love instead of from position of already being loved.

This is one of the greatest prayers that we can pray for ourselves and for one another:

“That He would give you, according to the riches of His glory, power to be strengthened by His Spirit in the inner man, and that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all saints what is the breadth and length and depth and height, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God” (Eph. 3:16-19).

The fullness of God is to know His love which is beyond our intellectual capacity and knowledge. To be filled with the revelation of God’s love is to be filled with all His fulness. There is nothing greater. As believers, we’ve got to move past identifying ourselves with anyone or anything—whether they be our failures, our greatest achievements/accomplishments, man’s acceptance and approval, what we do or don’t do, our jobs/careers, churches, ministries, finances and so on. and move into a full-fledged identity with His love.

The heart that knows he is loved by God the Father and the Lord Jesus Christ ceases to look elsewhere for love, peace and satisfaction. His delight is in the Lord. He has found his dwelling place and his rest in Him. When you receive a revelation of His deep love for you, it will put such a delight and contentment in your soul. It is then that you will truly live free and full.

Please see this brief excerpt of this service where we ministered on the love of the Father: The Father’s Love (see from the 47:27 minute mark to 50:05)

If you could receive an impartation of the greatest evangelist in history while immersed in the greater glory before they passed, would you jump at the chance?

Well, guess what! Evangelist Reinhard Bonnke is coming to Phoenix to release that mantle and fire one last time! He has led more people to Christ and preached to more people face to face in his outdoor crusades than any other evangelist in world history. During his last crusade, he preached to 6 million people! Cripples walk, the blind see, the deaf hear and even the dead are raised during his crusades.

Also, Lou Engle has strongly felt from the Holy Spirit to join us June 14-17, 2018! Lou has recently been hosting The Call and the famous The Call Azusa in Los Angeles! Lou understands the intercessory force that it takes to see a great harvest spring up and America turn back to God. He senses something stirring in Arizona and rearranged his schedule to be with us in these meetings!

We, David and Stephanie Herzog, with Jake Hamilton leading worship, have never been so excited about these meetings. We know they will ignite a huge harvest of souls and awakening, the likes of which we have never seen in our lifetime! We don’t want you to miss the impartation God has for you this June in Phoenix! David Herzog Ministries will be hosting the Summer of Glory Festival in beautiful Phoenix, Arizona, June 14-17, 2018, and we want you to be there!

A Missouri state court jury of eight women and four men found pro-life activist John Ryan not guilty of 17-month-old charges that he had made a terrorist threat against a Planned Parenthood employee.

At the end of a three-day trial, the jury deliberated for about an hour before reaching its verdict on Wednesday.

The charges arose when Casey Spiegel, a Planned Parenthood employee at a clinic in the 4000 block of Forest Park Avenue, reported that as she walked toward Ryan at the entrance to Planned Parenthood’s parking lot on December 31, 2016, he told her there were seven bombs in the building. Police arrested Ryan on the scene and held him for 35 hours, when he was released on bond.

The prosecuting attorney for the City of St. Louis filed felony charges against Ryan, accusing him of making terrorist threats. A St. Louis grand jury refused to indict Ryan, at which point, on April 7, 2017, prosecutor Kim Gardner’s office used a legal maneuver by refiling the case with “information,” which is a process used to bypass the grand jury.

“Planned Parenthood and prosecutor Kim Gardner’s office branded me a felony terrorist 17 months ago, and that is permanently imprinted on the internet forever. Yet I am grateful to the Thomas More Society and a jury that saw through these lies and deliberated only an hour to acquit me,” Ryan said. “Actually, two juries have cleared me on these charges—first the grand jury and now the trial jury.”

The charges against Ryan, originally filed in January 2017, were cited repeatedly by sponsors and supporters, including Planned Parenthood, of the Board of Aldermen’s so-called “buffer zone” bill, which would have kept sidewalk counselors and protesters opposing abortion a set distance away from the driveway into Planned Parenthood’s parking lot and building.

Sidewalk counselors and protesters claim the right to access the part of the driveway that crosses a public sidewalk.

Ryan noted that “Alderwomen Megan Green and Christine Ingrassia used this so-called terrorist threat as one of the main reasons a buffer zone bill was needed. The campaign to pass the buffer zone ordinance was based on a lie.”

Brad Blake, special counsel for The Thomas More Society who represented Ryan, noted, “When you see the video of the entire encounter, it is clear that the accusing witness, carrying a yellow shoulder bag, had zero reaction when Mr. Ryan, in the yellow jacket, was speaking to her. Her lack of reaction speaks louder than words.

“This criminal charge, with its attendant bond restrictions that keep John away from the Planned Parenthood facilities, succeeded in muzzling him and depriving him of his First Amendment rights to use the public sidewalk, as he had for years previously, to voice his pro-life message. This deprivation of his free speech rights was based on bogus allegations by Planned Parenthood that were then advanced by Prosecutor Kim Gardner’s office.”

Blake, a former prosecutor himself, added, “Prosecutor Kim Gardner’s goal was not justice, but rather persecution. That is evident because her office persisted with this case after the grand jury refused to indict Mr. Ryan based on insufficient evidence and after he passed a polygraph test.” {eoa}

At least eight women have accused actor Morgan Freeman of inappropriate behavior or harassment while working with them on film sets or at promotional events, CNN reported on Thursday.

CNN said it spoke with 16 people as part of its investigation into the 80-year-old actor, some of whom also alleged inappropriate behavior by Freeman at his production company, Revelations Entertainment.

In a statement, Freeman said he was sorry to anyone who had been made to feel uncomfortable or disrespected.

“Anyone who knows me or has worked with me knows I am not someone who would intentionally offend or knowingly make anyone feel uneasy,” the statement said. “I apologize to anyone who felt uncomfortable or disrespected—that was never my intent.”

Representatives for Freeman and Revelations Entertainment did not respond to requests for further comment. Reuters was unable to independently confirm any of the allegations.

Multiple accusations of sexual misconduct against male actors, filmmakers and agents have roiled Hollywood since October 2017, leading in some cases to resignations and the halting of projects.

Similar accusations have also engulfed men in U.S. politics and business, and inspired a #MeToo social media movement by victims sharing their stories of sexual harassment or abuse.

CNN said eight people told the network they were victims of what some labeled harassment and others called inappropriate behavior by Freeman. It said eight others told the network they witnessed the actor’s alleged misconduct.

CNN also said other sources denied having seen any questionable behavior by the actor, and that those sources described him as being professional on set and in the office.

Freeman, whose career has spanned 50 years and more than 100 movies, won a Oscar in 2005 as best supporting actor for his role as a former boxer in “Million Dollar Baby.” {eoa}

© 2018 Thomson Reuters. All rights reserved.

This weekend, breakout Star Wars character Han Solo stars in his own movie, Solo. The movie is sure to top charts at the box office. But should discerning Christians go see this movie? Plugged In breaks down both the good and the bad of this blockbuster prequel.

I have seen many wounded souls over the past decade while working with couples and individuals in both inpatient psychiatric hospitals and outpatient office settings. These wounds are at the core of their being. Many of these souls have experienced trauma in one form or another.

The person who has experienced a trauma has experienced this in all three levels of their being: spirit, soul and body. All three parts have been defiled, injured or neglected. If the trauma affects all three dimensions of a person, doesn’t it make sense that the healing of trauma involves all three aspects of the spirit, soul and body?

I tell you this because some of you reading this will have people who may have hurt you significantly, and you have presumed to have forgiven them; however, the bullet is still inside. The muck and defilement are still surrounding it. That doesn’t necessarily mean you didn’t forgive them. It just means you haven’t cleansed your temple yet.

The concept I am about to suggest to you may seem foreign or uncomfortable at first. My experience with cleansing the temple is nothing short of miraculous. I have seen sexual abuse survivors heal very quickly after this exercise. I have seen women who have been sexually betrayed by their Christian husbands suddenly be able to move through the stages of grief and forgiveness so much more quickly than those who refuse to cleanse their temple.

What I would encourage you to do is keep an open mind and try this exercise if you feel your spouse or others have injured you. After (not before) you do this exercise, you can tell if it has been effective or not.

1. Anger Letter

The first step in the cleansing of your temple is to choose someone on your list of people who have hurt you and write an anger letter to him or her (never send it). This is not a letter to suppress but rather let out all the thoughts and feelings of hate, disgust and anguish that has been robbing your soul. This letter is not an “I forgive you” letter.

2. Warm up

First, warm up your body. Take your bat (tennis racquet, sport bat) and hit your mattress or pillow first with small hits then medium, large and extra-large hits. I recommend you do this three consecutive times. Then warm up your voice as well. Using the word “no” along with the hits, speak out small, medium, large and extra-large “no’s” while hitting. This may feel awkward, but removing this buildup of pain out of your soul and spirit feels almost like having a baby, so you want to be physically warmed up.

While you’re warming up, you may want to make sure you are home alone, and I would also turn off your phone so that you are not disturbed.

3. Read the letter out loud.

After your physical warmup, take the letter you wrote to your offender and read it out loud. If your offender’s name is “Toby”, then you would read the letter out loud such as this: Toby, how could you have done this to me? I trusted you! …”

Now of course Toby is nowhere around. You certainly don’t need to do this with him or her around. You are simply in a room alone just reading the letter aloud.

4. Engage the anger physically and verbally.

After reading your letter you can put your letter down and pick up your bat. You can hit the bed or pillow and let “Toby” symbolically have it. You can yell, scream or cry, but let the infection out that has been robbing you. You can symbolically tell him his secrets are not controlling you anymore, and he was to blame. You have no limits as to what you can say to your offender. For once, let go of all the control that is keeping this wound infected. Let it out!

This can last anywhere from 15 minutes to an hour. Usually your body will let you know when you are done putting this behind you spiritually, emotionally and physically.

You’re worth getting it all out. Someone has given you something toxic. You have been unhealthy ever since and after you remove it from you, you will feel so much better.

Comments

When you do your cleansing the temple exercise, you should only work on one offender at a time. If you have been offended by three different people, then that is three different cleansing the temple sessions. Do not go into this exercise and do it once for all the different people who have offended you. Each “bullet” needs to be taken out separately.

If you have several people on your list who have caused you trauma prior to or during your marriage make a list of them somewhere. What I tell clients is to start with the least painful trauma and work your way up to the larger offenses. This way, you get better skilled at the exercise and will know what to expect.

Each person you work on may give you different experiences or insights. I’ve know some men and women who thought offender No. 3 was going to be the worst, and yet a lesser one actually was a much larger experiences for them.

When you continue to carry all this pain inside, you protect yourself from being hurt and being intimate in the process.

As you have taken the time to read through this, you may have your own thoughts about it. If you feel you need to do this exercise for those who have caused you past pain that is now affecting your life and relationships, then try it.

Doug Weiss, Ph.D., is a nationally known author, speaker and licensed psychologist. He is the executive director of Heart to Heart Counseling Center in Colorado Springs, Colorado, and the author of several books including, The 7 Love Agreements. You may contact Dr. Weiss via his website, or on his Facebook, by phone at 719-278-3708 or through email at heart2heart@.